Sly Bald Guys Forum
Discussions About Being Bald => To be or not be...Bald => Topic started by: Rube on August 22, 2011, 10:03:20 AM
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Hey guys, I've been balding at a highly uneven pace since I was 13 (as in I lost a bunch of hair initially, then it stopped, and now I'm losing it again). It's gotten to the point where I have very little hair left, and based on what I've read the best thing to do would be to shave it off. But whenever I ask people if I should shave my head, they all give me a very strong "NO!" Many people have also added that I would look horrible bald, and I think they might be right. My ears and nose are enormous, and my head isn't very symmetrical. My forehead also looks big, but I think that's just because of the balding thing. I've read posts similar to this one, but in all those cases it was the poster thinking they looked too ugly to shave their heads. But in my case I realize I need to shave it, but everyone else thinks I'd look like a clown if I did. I've also already got depression and possible social anxiety pretty bad, so I'm worried that if I shave my head and it turns out to be a disaster that I might do something stupid.
So what options are available for people who are losing their hair but actually are too weird looking to shave it? There's no way I could afford a surgery, and I'm not going to become a slave to rogaine or anything like that. Should I just buzz my hair really short and see how that goes? Furthermore, I work outside so my face is pretty tan. In order to avoid having half of my head being stark white and the other half almost brown, should I wait to shave it until the winter when the rest of my head isn't as dark? I know it'll be pretty cold, but I'm not too worried about that. I've attached some pics so you can see what I'm talking about (I know I'm supposed to link them, but I got an error message when I tried to download the google picasa thing).
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Shave it, you will look great.
I can see from the 2nd pic that you will suit a shaved head. Just buzz it down with no guard and it will look really good. Don't worry about what others say, they will always try and persuade you not to shave it.
I had the same problem with you with depression and stuff and even wore a piece for 2 years thats how much I didn't want to shave. Eventually I had to give in as it was torture. And you know what, its really not too bad. I am getting used to it.
You have a much better head shape than me so I would deffo shave it.
Its going to keep falling out anyway so you might as well take control and do it.
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Dude, with that great smile how could anyone possibly deem you ugly?
Just grab your balls and shave it off! You will likely be amazed how great you look. Even in the unlikely event you decide you'd rather have a sparse mop on your head, it grows back. You have nothing to lose by trying it!
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We can all relate to that feeling of anxiety before shaving your head for the first time. But hey If you don't like it, It'll grow back. (As many others here will likely tell you!)
My advice would be to crack on now while there's still enough sun around to get a little colour on your dome. Don't worry about the tonal difference, That's gonna happen in winter also!
Start off by buzzing it down to say a #4. Get used to that and them progress towards a #2 and so on until your shaving without a guard. Then you can bust out the wet shave! ;D
Some people prefer the 'All or nothing' approach, But I gradually worked my way down and I'm pleased I did as it gave me and others time to get adjusted to my new look.
As for the depression etc.. I was there a little over 1 year ago, Shaving my head really helped me get over a few issues. Also some well spent time talking to people, Whether professionals or otherwise O0
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It is definitely possible to be too ugly to go bald! Look at me! But I went and did it anyway because I just don't care what others think.
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You will look much better once you shave it off. I know that when I still had hair I was always worried about what people were thinking of me but once I shaved it off I got a huge boost of confidence. If you dont like it once you go smooth, its only hair and it can grow back. I am one of the 'all or nothing' types, get over the initial shock of it and enjoy it
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A couple of things: 1) you won't look like a clown if you shave. 2) it's almost impossible to visualize yourself bald, so when other people say you'll look bad, it's only an opinion, not a fact. 3) you can buzz short and see if you like it, then decide if you want to shave it off. 4) if you don't like it, your hair will grow back.
Regarding #2 above, I stood in front of the mirror covering my hair with my hands, trying to imagine being bald. I couldn't do it. When I first saw myself completely shaved, I was startled at the difference, yet I very quickly grew to love it. You probably will love the new look and feel when you decide to go for it.
You may be nervous about seeing people at first - most of us were, but realize that most people are too busy with their own lives to pay too much attention to your head.
Give it a try - Good luck!
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Thanks for the advice guys! I've decided I'm gonna go ahead and buzz it way down this week before school starts, so that when people meet me at the start of the semester I'll already be nearly bald. Hopefully this will cut down on the shock if I decide to shave the rest of it off later.
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Everyone had great advice. From pic #2 I think you'd look really good. I'm an all or nothing person. Why spread the anxiety out and continue trying to gage other people. It's what you think that matters. My opinion would be to shave it now so if you don't like, it will have a little time to get to the #1 length. Why let everyone see you with #1 and then go all the way?
I'm 4 days in today. Went to work today for the first time, and overall, had a pretty good day. The main issue I had to today was me. I thought I was feeling really confident but realized I still had some doubts. Early in the morning and a couple other times spaced throughout the day, someone took one look, paused, and lit up when they said "I like it. It's great." That got me through the day.
No doubt you will have the same. I think you look good. Bad hair just looks bad.
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Weirdness is as weirdness does. What is it with this hesitancy about "looking strange" if you go sly? Now for "strange," you want Tom Hanks or Justin Bieber, surely.
I went to a festival (incognito, of course) the other night, and there were many sly among the throng. Not one of them looked "ugly." But, then, those of us who are sly have many reasons to favor the look.
If you think people might whisper and point, just dress as I do. Their attention will be diverted, I guarantee. Red, I say, RED.
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There's nothing wrong with how you look. You would definitely benefit from a headshave. A severely receded hairline isn't flattering on anybody.
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I echo all the other voices here. You will look good totally bald. I started shaving my head when I knew that it was getting noticable up front. Since then I grew hair out a couple of different times and saw that the top and back were getting thin. So now I just keep it shaved. Besides if you shave now, it is not a shock when full male pattern baldness takes place!
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I say hell no, just shave it off. It's only ugly if you let it be ugly. Wear it with pride
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You have a great facial and head structure and no your ears are not too big for a shaved head. Check the gallery here for many pics of guys who are shaved. Your nose is not too big either. I bet the people you asked are not headshavers and most likely your family. Families hate changes in appearances. Also older folks still have a memory of previous generations when being bald was viewed very differently than it is today. Tonight at my kettlebell class 3 of the 5 guys had shaved heads. Each looked great btw.
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You've got nothing to worry about. As everyone else here has said, just do it and soon you'll feel much better about yourself.
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"Is it possible to actually be too ugly to go bald?"
The answer is no. Smile and be confident - these are the traits that ultimately define attractiveness.
Go for it.
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Man, I don't define ugly by outward appearances. I've seen quite a few people in this world that were classified as beautiful or handsome, but their attitude made them ugly to the bone. Do what is right for you. Keep that smile on your face and people will come running. If not, that smile will make them wonder what you are up to.
I am by no means handsome, but I do give everyone a smile.
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Well here we go, I just buzzed it down to a #1. So far I'm not sure what I think about it: part of me thinks it looks weird while the other part thinks it looks better than it did. No one I know has seen it yet, but I know that when they do they're gonna be pretty upset simply because they told me not to do it. Oh well, I'll let it go for a few weeks and see if I get used to it.
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Hey! It looks great!
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Looks Awesome !
Always remember that change is not easy, mainly to those who have a certain "image" of how you should look.
In your case you know you had to alter your current hairstyle anyways.
Give it time !
---Stasiu
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Looks great!!!
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You were worried? About what exactly? The new look is great! Next step, get out a razor and go to the skin, time for sly is now. KEEP it up for 30 days,then you will learn you never want hair again.
Again, I'm not blowing smoke up your arse, It really looks great.
Welcome to the club.
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it looks really good.
O0
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Better! Much better.
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Well here we go, I just buzzed it down to a #1. So far I'm not sure what I think about it: part of me thinks it looks weird while the other part thinks it looks better than it did. No one I know has seen it yet, but I know that when they do they're gonna be pretty upset simply because they told me not to do it. Oh well, I'll let it go for a few weeks and see if I get used to it.
Looks good my friend, you have nothing to worry about. Just smile like in that picture and you'll be fine! O:O
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You were worried? About what exactly? The new look is great! Next step, get out a razor and go to the skin, time for sly is now. KEEP it up for 30 days,then you will learn you never want hair again.
Again, I'm not blowing smoke up your arse, It really looks great.
Welcome to the club.
Well, now that my hair's a lot shorter I've noticed it's a lot thinner than I thought; so I'm going to have to shave it sooner or later. I think I'll wait for a few weeks though, so my head can get some more color and my poor mother doesn't have a heart attack. I also think it'd be kinda cool to go through some of the upcoming semester with a short buzz then just randomly show up with no hair at all. I'd get a lot of attention that way, which is something I only mind when it's about my receding hairline.
Thanks for all the compliments everyone, I really appreciate it! I still feel a little weird, but I expect that will go away in a few days. I can't wait to go to work tomorrow and see everyone's facial expressions ;)
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Big improvement. O0 Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
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Thumbs up in my book! O0 BTW, I also used to worry about what other people said about everything. So this could be a good exercise in being your own person!
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O0 O0 O0
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Well here we go, I just buzzed it down to a #1. So far I'm not sure what I think about it: part of me thinks it looks weird while the other part thinks it looks better than it did.
You look fantastic with a #1.
I went down to a #1 back in June. Liked it so much, that a week or so later, I took the #1 off and went bare clippers! Even better! Feels cool. Looks smart. Your hair is never messed up. Let us know when you go down to the next notch.
Nice picture.
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Oh, the 'after' picture looks much better than the 'before' pictures. Good job.
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Can you be too ugly to go bald?
Uh, no..... look at the picture to the left! :*))
Congrats!
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You look great. As others here on the Forum have said, don't worry about people making comments. If you like the new look, that's all that matters!
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I agree with Schro..................... look at his picture.
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Great picture. It really looks great.
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Yes! You can rock that look!
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No.
They are simply trying to control you when telling you stuff about how ugly you would look.
Good for you in having the balls to ignore them.
Looks good.
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Well the #1 was starting to look kind of scruffy to me, so I buzzed my head again without any guard to see what would happen. I rather like the look (despite the color difference), but all the feedback I've received so far has been incredibly negative; with most of it being about how much I look like a racist. This has me a little paranoid, because I start school on Tuesday and my college has a very high African American population. I know they won't attack me or anything, I'm just worried that they might think I hate them, which is not true. So I don't know, I might let my hair grow back out to a #1. Did you guys get this kind of feedback when you first shaved your heads too?
Here's another picture, btw. Oh, and ignore the big red mark on the top of my forehead. Apparently there's a reason for all those projectile warnings on string trimmers...
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I'd be very surprised if anyone at college judges you and thinks you're a racist because your head is shaved. The people who are telling you otherwise are trying to manipulate you. Don't let them.
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I don't think the sly look has anything to do with being racist and I'd really be surprised if you fellow college students feel that way. I work in an office building with lots of African American people and no one has accused me of being racist. Many of my African American colleagues sport the sly look as well.
I'm also surprised that you got lots of negative feedback for shaving it off. I had one or two negative comments, but the general reaction was positive.
My advice - if you like the sly look, try it at school. You might find the people there more accepting. After all, college is supposed to broaden your horizons.
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More of the same here. I live in New Orleans, in the "central city" with at least 40-60% African American residents depending on the neighborhood--and no one absolutely no one has come up with that comment and we have as one of our less admired citizens at times--David Duke, of Klu Klux Klan fame--and a total idiot, but he has hair, might not be his though >:D. Perhaps Ohio isn't the most diverse area and is, pardon the expression, less cosmopolitan than we are. We value our diversity--and apparently so does the rest of the entire world--jazz, music, art, food that every person seems to want to experience, Mardi Gras, etc. are our exports. I wouldn't listen to the folks that say this--and ask them if they've had any experience outside Ohio. Live in the bigger world--it's where the action is. Remember, you can always take your bald head to better places--and more fools they if they lose you.
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More of the same here. I live in New Orleans, in the "central city" with at least 40-60% African American residents depending on the neighborhood--and no one absolutely no one has come up with that comment and we have as one of our less admired citizens at times--David Duke, of Klu Klux Klan fame--and a total idiot, but he has hair, might not be his though >:D. Perhaps Ohio isn't the most diverse area and is, pardon the expression, less cosmopolitan than we are. We value our diversity--and apparently so does the rest of the entire world--jazz, music, art, food that every person seems to want to experience, Mardi Gras, etc. are our exports. I wouldn't listen to the folks that say this--and ask them if they've had any experience outside Ohio. Live in the bigger world--it's where the action is. Remember, you can always take your bald head to better places--and more fools they if they lose you.
You make a good point, the area I live in is quite restrictive as far as culture goes. Most guys my age look pretty much the same: polo shirt, khaki shorts, hat on backwards, and an "I'm the greatest thing since Moses" demeanor. So people probably aren't used to seeing a young guy with a shaved head. Most of the people I've seen in the past two days are also much older than myself, and it seems that people from older generations are more likely to view a shaved head as a symbol of racism. Whatever, I'll keep the look for a while and see what happens. It definitely looks better than when I had hair.
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Well the #1 was starting to look kind of scruffy to me, so I buzzed my head again without any guard to see what would happen. I rather like the look (despite the color difference),
I've had the same experience. Really prefer no guard than the #1. My profile picture is about a #1, but I'm going with no guard right now. I think your latest picture looks GREAT. You look just like the youth pastor at my church! He shaves nearly bald.
but all the feedback I've received so far has been incredibly negative; with most of it being about how much I look like a racist. This has me a little paranoid, because I start school on Tuesday and my college has a very high African American population. I know they won't attack me or anything, I'm just worried that they might think I hate them, which is not true. So I don't know, I might let my hair grow back out to a #1. Did you guys get this kind of feedback when you first shaved your heads too?
No one has said a thing about my ultra short hair, except my wife and daughters who were not too crazy about it, but I think they are getting used to it now.
Here's another picture, btw. Oh, and ignore the big red mark on the top of my forehead. Apparently there's a reason for all those projectile warnings on string trimmers...
Funny. Well, not so funny. Wear goggles!
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Funny. Well, not so funny. Wear goggles!
Don't worry, I always do! But of course the little rock would find the area of my face without any protection, and of course even a tiny rock moving at high speeds would be enough to give me a scratch. I wonder if I can get workman's comp for that? :P
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Few places are more tolerant of individual expression -- particularly in terms of personal appearance -- than college campuses. You're worrying over nothing.
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Well the #1 was starting to look kind of scruffy to me, so I buzzed my head again without any guard to see what would happen. I rather like the look (despite the color difference), but all the feedback I've received so far has been incredibly negative; with most of it being about how much I look like a racist. This has me a little paranoid, because I start school on Tuesday and my college has a very high African American population. I know they won't attack me or anything, I'm just worried that they might think I hate them, which is not true. So I don't know, I might let my hair grow back out to a #1. Did you guys get this kind of feedback when you first shaved your heads too?
Here's another picture, btw. Oh, and ignore the big red mark on the top of my forehead. Apparently there's a reason for all those projectile warnings on string trimmers...
You look good. O0
It sounds like you live in a place with people that have a lot of issues (since they seem to have a problem with what you do with your hair). Don't buy into their crap. Be yourself and do what you want to do with your head.
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. Whatever, I'll keep the look for a while and see what happens. It definitely looks better than when I had hair.
As we say in New Orleans, You da man Rube! O0, You da man! And don't you forget it.
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Funny. Well, not so funny. Wear goggles!
Don't worry, I always do! But of course the little rock would find the area of my face without any protection, and of course even a tiny rock moving at high speeds would be enough to give me a scratch. I wonder if I can get workman's comp for that? :P
If you were on the job, perhaps workman's comp would pay up. You could always wear a motorcycle helmet when you weedwhack! It would look funny, but you could do it and it would protect your head.
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You look good man. Those people who are saying you look like a racist are probably the same ones who made fun of your hairline.
Seems you cant win with them no matter what---I hope these are just jokes between friends and that's it. If that's not the case---find new friends.
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As far as the whole racist thing goes, I live in eastern Washington and have a lake house at Hayden Lake which was well known as a KKK haven, Richard Butler had a compound there and was famous for all the racist things he did, parades included. I too was alittle worried about the reactions because of that whole ordeal over there but the way I see it is that most of the guys in the 'klan' have hair and a buzzed head looks more like the traditional skinhead in my opinion, just look at the first skinheads in the UK.
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I too was alittle worried about the reactions because of that whole ordeal over there but the way I see it is that most of the guys in the 'klan' have hair and a buzzed head looks more like the traditional skinhead in my opinion, just look at the first skinheads in the UK.
Yea, I've been reading about the original skinheads since people starting calling me one and it's really nothing to be ashamed of. Besides, I ran into an old friend of mine and he was sly! That boosted my confidence a lot, because when we were younger he was one of those kids who all the guys wanted to be like, and all the girls wanted to date. So it's good to know I look like the "cool kid," even if that was years ago. He's also Puerto Rican, so I highly doubt he's a Nazi.
Anyway, thanks to all who responded for the encouragement, and I'm pretty sure no one's gonna try to stab me tomorrow. If they do I know a little Tai Chi (which is a very effective martial art if you know how to use it) and karate, so I should be fine :D