Sly Bald Guys Forum
Discussions About Being Bald => To be or not be...Bald => Topic started by: timetobeme on July 16, 2010, 12:11:21 AM
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I wore a hairpiece for 13 years. At the start I was very self-conscious but in time I became more and more comfortable with it. I knew I would not wear it forever. I used to set goals for myself, when I became married I would take it off-didn't happen. When I turned 30 I would take it off-didn't happen. In time something very interesting became to happen: I would look at bald guys and feel very envious of their freedom. It had been at least five years of wanting to be free of the rug and always falling back into the security of fooling myself. Oh, how I loathed the expense, the maintenance, the constant worrying when someone I was talking with would look at my hair, but I could not see a way out of it.
I would hear of people who were balding being so nervous about whether to shave off their remaining hair, knowing full well that it would grow back. I was very envious of this, as for a toupee wearer, when it comes off there is no going back. And the transition would be extreme, from a full head of someone else's hair, to nothing. What would people say, how would they react? And so another year would pass with me wearing the dreaded, expensive, cumbersome hairpiece. Finally, I found this forum and made up my mind to stop the insanity and be free. I set a date, gathered my supplies and did the deed. Words cannot describe the immediate sense of freedom. I was free. I was in control. No longer did I have to worry about appointments, the expense, or maintenance. I was free! You could not wipe the smile off of my face for any amount of money.
Before I removed the piece and shaved I worried a lot about the condition of my scalp, after all it had been covered for well over a decade. There were some issues with how my scalp looked for a few days (to me anyway) but nothing that a little Bio Oil and sunlight couldn’t take care of.
Now, for seeing people for the first time, I was honestly a little nervous, but remarkably I was much more excited. After the first person the anxiety goes away and I was looking forward to the reaction of others. Did I get asked why? It felt like about a million times, thought it was much, much less. I had anticipated this and had a few zingers for a response. Did most people have no comment? Yes, yes, yes! The vast majority of people that I knew simply had no comment, nothing, nil, zilch! Were there negative comments? A very, very small number that never deterred my love for the taste of freedom.
Now that I have been sly for nearly two months I can honestly say that I have never once regretted my decision! Not even for a second. After the first couple of weeks I thought about being bald less and less and it is now just who I am. I see pictures of how I looked before and never once do I long for my “hair”. I look at the photos and feel embarrassed for wearing someone else’s for so long.
If you are reading this and considering should I remove the hairpiece or not, I understand. It is a BIG transition. You Will look different. You have been brainwashed for years into being someone you are not. In hindsight taking off the rug was an easy thing to do. I just did it. But it took me years to get to that place where I was confident enough to just do it. If I could change anything it would have been to have done it years ago! I can’t imagine any hairpiece wearer ever regretting removing it! I don’t, and you won’t either! Your days of freedom await, they are LONG overdue!!!
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Outstanding post TTBM! I never wore a rug but I buzzed my hair short for about seven years before shaving. When I look at photos from that time frame and see the little islands of hair on top of my head I think.... "What the Hell was I thinking???".
It never bothered me because I've always been a guy that pretty much nothing bothered. Even when I shaved I just sort of did it one day. No big deal..... though the change was pretty significant!!!
Freedom for $9.99!!! .......... The cost of a blade and some shave cream. A much better investment than the raccoon on top of the head look.
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O0
This belongs on the Blog, really.
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Fantastic post! If this doesn't knock some men off the fence, nothing will. One question: Who did the art work on the head. Priceless!!!
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Hi timetobeme -- as a former wearer of a dead possum on the top of my head I can relate completely to your story. Congrats on breaking through to freedom. I crossed the 8 month mark at the beginning of July and am never looking back. Like I tell my daughters -- hair is for girls -- dead possums are for the road.
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Fantastic post!! Thank you for sharing that with us and those that are struggling with if they can remove their piece or not.
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GREAT GREAT GREAT post - - -Thank you - -Everyone with a "piece" should be made to read this
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Thanks for sharing your story.
If I may ask, did you put the rug on and off every day or was it glued on for a longer period of time?
Secondly, can you describe how you felt about it when you wore it? Like some kind of hat, or a prosthesis, or what?
Just curious. :)
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As all of the guys have said, fantastic post. Thanks for sharing.
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Congrats on the freedom! O0
Great post! O0
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Between your great story and Todd's, it's quite clear that the answer to the question:
Is it time to remove the hairpiece?
Is always: YES!
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Between your great story and Todd's, it's quite clear that the answer to the question:
Is it time to remove the hairpiece?
Is always: YES!
what bootedbear said. O0
WARHAWK O0
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YUP! What bootedbear said! O:O
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Great post,
My big day is the day after tomorrow (Tuesday). I'm going to pull off the hairpiece and shave my head. Though I must admit that I am as nervous as can be. My stomach is in knots and a great deal of fear is creeping in. The fear has actually kept me from sleeping, thus the 4:15 am post. TTBM, what zingers did you use? Also, what is Bio Oil?
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Congratulations TTBM great post, sounds like what I went through when I decided to get rid of the stupid rug. How dumb could I have been to wear that thing for all those years thinking I was fooling everyone.. NOT! Mauricio, don't sweat it, just do it. You will notice that noone will really have that much to say. Just don't make a big deal about it. If someone notices just say that it's summer and you decided to shave to keep cool and if you like it, you plan to keep it then just never go back to the rug. You won't want to, it feels soooo good. To gain more confidence in yourself, go out more and more even if it's to Walmart just to walk around and to see that noone really looks at you. And don't hide behind a cap (except in the sun) you've already hid behind the rug. Anyway guys, congratulations and welcome to freedom.
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Congratulations Mauricio! I am very excited for you, trust me, you are making the right decision. I think Johnnyo has some great advice. As far as zingers check out this link for some ideas http://www.slybaldguys.com/smf/index.php?topic=12288.0 Bio Oil can be found in most drugstores. It really helped with my scalp for a few days after. Good luck, post some pics and don't be nervous...this will be a very good thing for you...be excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Hello gyus.I am a man from Norway,im 41 year old.I wear a rug since 1992.That time i was young and dont like to loose my hair.In these year the rug is being a pain in my ass.Im older now,but i fear to take it of.Tomorrow me and my family is going to spain on a 2 weeks holiday.I want to take the rug off.My wife says i should do it too.I have butterflies innside me.But i want to take off.The glue is always a problem whwn its hot in spain.The rug is getting red too.Always messy with the glue too.Please help me guys,tupe or not tupe?
Best regard from a man across the atlantic up in the cold north(Norway)P.S sorry for my bad english.
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My wife says i should do it too.I have butterflies innside me.But i want to take off.
Go with it, go to Spain as a free man, and you won't ever regret it.
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The butterflies in your stomach is the excitement of being free. Do it man!
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Thank you saintc.I am nervous.What will my friends say when i come home.Many question in my head right now.I am not bald all over my head.I am most thin in the front.So should i only use the barbermachine or should i shave it.I think in my head that maybe one step at the time.What did you guys do the first time?
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Thank you saintc.I am nervous.What will my friends say when i come home.Many question in my head right now.I am not bald all over my head.I am most thin in the front.So should i only use the barbermachine or should i shave it.I think in my head that maybe one step at the time.What did you guys do the first time?
Nervous is natural, you've been wearing it for a long time. But, your friends know you wear a toupee and I would be willing to bet most will be happy to see you free and happy. Use the clipper, it's what I think you mean by barbermachine, and clip it as short as possible. Take a nice shower, shampoo your scalp--RELAX. Then lather up the scalp, take a new blade and shave it off. Take your time, you'll get better at this very quickly. Then rinse, some good after shave--and you're free. If you've worn a rug that long, you are going to really love not having the hassle. skål O0
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cantona - as a former rug wearer I can tell you that the freedom of shaving your head is incredible. There are several of us on the forums and we've all commented afterwords the we wish we would have done it sooner. Do it in Spain and get some sun on your scalp to even out the color. Perfect time to do it. For me I went to my hair stylist and had her remove my system and buzz the sides down -- I went home and did the rest with a razor. You won't regret it - and for most of us - the comments from others after we shaved our heads were nothing but positive.
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Thank you guys.I will tell you that i have think about this for many year,but i didn t find a time to do it.I have allways being scared of looking to old when i want to take of the rug.Did you guys feel much older when you take it of the first time.That is what scared me most.Hope you guys understand my bad english.
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Thank you guys.I will tell you that i have think about this for many year,but i didn t find a time to do it.I have allways being scared of looking to old when i want to take of the rug.Did you guys feel much older when you take it of the first time.That is what scared me most.Hope you guys understand my bad english.
Rug or no rug, I think everyone looks younger without "bad hair!" You'll look younger!
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Do it now. You will see you will look much younger.
Enjoy your holidays with this new freedom and new feeling O0.
But do not forget a sunblocker with high SPF 50 plus. Spanish sun shines at day and night.
Best wishes for you and nice holidays
from this side of the Atlantic ocean - Germany.
J
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BTW - Welcome here!
Glad you joined.
J
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Take the rug off cantona, real freedom awaits you!
Listen to the guys, especially pdxtodd, he's been there.
Good luck and let us know how it goes. O0
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Thanks again.I now feel free to get rid of my rug.I will let you guys know how it was.I just take a look in the mirror,that i have done the last 20 years.Something with a rug is that you spend many hours in front of the mirror,and hope that you have styled your hair so well that no one can see that you wear a rug.All the glue down at your own hair after a few weeks.Afraid of that someone pull fingers throug your hair.You cannot swim,afraid your hair fell off.Cant play football(soccer)Cant do any sport.Glue on the pillow.Red hair(looks like a rat on the top of the head)I must say that all you guys have balls ;D that can shave your head.No i hope it will be me.Thanks again for backing me up. :)
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>all you guys have balls that can shave your head.No i hope it will be me.
cantona, it will be you!
All you have to do is take that first step, and I'll bet my left nut that your reaction will be: "Why the hell did I wait so freaking long?"
Freedom from the tyranny of hair awaits you!
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Thanks again.I now feel free to get rid of my rug.I will let you guys know how it was.
Great decision O0 and one you won't regret. Post up the pictures. And really enjoy Spain, a great place to introduce your new Sly self O:O.
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I hope the sun will do good on my head.Before when i go to spain,i allways used caps.And i will tell you,that was really hot.Really messi glue i promised you.Jesus christ.I will take it off.When i see all you lucky guys,i will do. O0
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I've never felt bad for men who turned bald. Even when I had a full head of hair.
I've always felt bad for men wearing a rug. To me it's living a lie.
I don't trust a male wig wearer. Never did, never will.
Welcome and great post!
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One key point - most of us rug wearers thinks that the transition is going to be huge and that everyone is going to be shocked. The reality - nobody really cares - and its all in our own minds. Time to get out the glue remover and get to work! Your scalp will thank you for stopping all of the nonsense!
RE: older or younger. Definitely younger looking. I had gray hair before -- I can honestly say that I no longer have gray hair :-)
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I must say that all you guys have balls ;D that can shave your head.No i hope it will be me.
It will be you cantona, you have the same balls, you have the thought in your head, so now go and do it!
Like bear said; You'll be saying to yourself "why didn't I do this sooner".
Get at it, and get smooth. Free yourself.
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Hey cantona, first of all welcome to the board. Secondly, congratulations on your upcoming freedom. I think doing it while on (or before) a vacation is a great idea, it will give you time to adjust and also give your scalp some sun. You are going to love the freedom! Enjoy and post some pics when you can.
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Hmm.. we never heard back. I wonder if he couldn't do it?
Geez, I had it a lot worse, and I have no regrets. Whether it's a rug, or hair transplants that require 5lbs of Toppik a day, ::) it's living a lie. Glad to be over that.
'sides, I sorta like shocking people, heh.. >:D
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Hey Time To Be Me. Your story is my story - only I wore a piece for 23 years. Thanks for sharing.
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It is past the time.
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Firstly you guys all rock
I wish I had the nerve alas I am still in the phase of what will my family think and how I will get laughed at (I cannot help it these are all emotions that run through my head). Plus I have just posted another thread I am a Hair Transplant victim with the scars of war on the back of my head. I ask this question I know alot of people know what the scar is (I believe more people in America would pick it). Other then that I am wondering if alot of people actually would not know also... I want to try buzz my head down to a number 3 or 2, I am thinning and receeded but am curious as to my head shape and the fact I would be an Asian Bald guy.
I am currently a fence sitter because of the scar *sigh*
In regards to the rug I would not go there myself. I thought about it and its super expensive to have a good one and maintenance. Its a tough subject on many angles when you tell your partner (if she does not know) and your family and friends. If I had the choice and had a rug I would ditch it and be free and buy that motorcycle or take that well earned holiday.
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Hello guys.I am back from Spain after 15 days on holiday.And guess what.I F.............ng do it.I trow my rug in the garbage in spain.And i shave my hair.My little kids was shocked the 1 day,but now its ok.But still it is a little bit wird to nor have my rug.But i can get use to it. :D
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Congrats. dude!!! Feels great, doesn't it?
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Welcome to Freedom Cantona. It only gets better.
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Congratulations Cantona, good to hear you chose to toss the rug. Enjoy your new found freedom.
Hang in there it will only get better, and you'll become more comfortable with the smooth dome.
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You're free! You're free!!!
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Ole Cantona! O0
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Hey Cantona --
As a former rug wearer I can relate. Wasn't it great to toss your hair system in the trash!? Such a powerful moment to finally be done with the deception. The deception of the hair replacement industry. Post a picture!
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Hello again guys.Just got home.Have to see on the camera to find some great picture,then i will post one picture in here.It feels good to not wear i hairpiece.Think of all the money i can save.I have play soccer for the first time in 18 years.Because of the messi glue,and that being afraid of that the rug sholud fell off when i played soccer.Jesus christ i simply love it.What was i thinking about all these years O0.
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Exactly! What were we thinking all those years! You'll run faster too - less friction :-)
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Sly and shaving
Easier when you get older...
I hear alot about you wish you had done it sooner but could it be human nature and age as a means to let go of insecurities. Rewind back in time when you were 30 or 35 (assuming you were thinning then) and would you shave it (I suspect you would armed with what you know now but surely acceptance and mentality changes as you grow and become more comfortable with yourself)
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Sly and shaving
Easier when you get older...
Not really. Younger people get a lot more leeway when it comes to experimenting with appearance.
I hear alot about you wish you had done it sooner but could it be human nature and age as a means to let go of insecurities. Rewind back in time when you were 30 or 35 (assuming you were thinning then) and would you shave it (I suspect you would armed with what you know now but surely acceptance and mentality changes as you grow and become more comfortable with yourself)
Don't buy into the myth that the decision is any easier for people who are a little older. People don't stop caring what they look like once they're past the age of 35. And I assure you that if you manage to reach that age without having addressed this matter (and I hope that doesn't happen), you'll be no less nervous about it then than you are now.
At the end of the day, regardless of what age you are when your hair starts going, and no matter how much it sucks, the cold hard truth is that it's something you have to learn to live with.
I was 33 -- the same age you are now -- when I first shaved my head. In no way was my situation unique; there were plenty of guys my age and younger going through the same thing. You said you have a scar that is 7-8 cm in length. That's about 3 inches. Not huge. A lot of guys have scars on their domes from old injuries, and I've seen plenty of shaved hair transplant recepients who had scars that were much more severe than what you're describing. A lot can be done to minimize the appearance of scars; there are people here who have had it done who can advise you.
I'm not trying to give you a hard time and I hope this isn't coming across that way. I fully understand your concerns. However, I don't think there's anything to be gained by continuing to postpone dealing with the problem. The sooner you deal with it, the sooner you can put it behind you, and the happier you will be. Make an appointment with a doctor and find out what can be done about the scar. And then buzz your hair as short as you feel comfortable with, count your blessings and enjoy your life. Remember that you're not alone; we're here to support you every step of the way. :)