Sly Bald Guys Forum

Confidence and Success => Relationships/Dating => Topic started by: MagmaBabe on February 27, 2007, 11:52:22 PM

Title: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 27, 2007, 11:52:22 PM
some awesome chat up lines, give these a try.... ;)
(money back guarantee if they don't work!)


• I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long.

• (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.

• Nice legs...what time do they open?

• Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.

• You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

• Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

• I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

• I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?

• I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.

• Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.

• I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.

• I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.

• Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway the heaven?

• You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

• Are those real?

• I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.

• If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

• I lost my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

• You know if I were you, I'd have sex with me.

• You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?

• Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

• My name is (name)... remember that, you'll be screaming it later.

• Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

• Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.

• My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute. "

• Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.

• My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.

• I know milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?

• I've lost my phone number, can I have yours?

• If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.

• Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza?

• Baby, I'm an American Express lover... you shouldn't go home without me.

• Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I?

• Do you wash your pants in Windex because I can see myself in them.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Tyler on February 27, 2007, 11:54:51 PM
 :o
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 03:14:52 AM
 ??? What?!!!   :P
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Tom McGarry. on February 28, 2007, 04:28:14 AM
 :*)) :*)) :*)) O0 ;D ;D :*))
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: schro on February 28, 2007, 06:02:20 AM
Oh, you have to be SINGLE to use those! That makes sense.  :o
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Noner on February 28, 2007, 06:45:54 AM
MagmaBabe, Have you been following me around?
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: PigPen on February 28, 2007, 06:55:29 AM
I like the one about the voices in the head. That's funny
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 07:39:10 AM
MagmaBabe, Have you been following me around?

 :o
erm....have you seen a woman dressed in red wearing a baseball cap and dark glasses?
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Robmeister on February 28, 2007, 08:55:35 AM
Good stuff, M.Babe...

Has anyone heard this one?:

Q: "You have beautiful hair.  Do you have any Italian in you?"

A: "No, I don't"

Q:  "Would you like one?"
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 09:23:29 AM
Good stuff, M.Babe...

Has anyone heard this one?:

Q: "You have beautiful hair.  Do you have any Italian in you?"

A: "No, I don't"

Q:  "Would you like one?"


erm, no, but I have heard the Irish version   >:D  ;)
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Robmeister on February 28, 2007, 09:31:14 AM
Bless you, my child
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: schro on February 28, 2007, 09:36:47 AM
As long as you don't turn into that other Evangelical Dude from Colorado, bless away Father Robmeister.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 09:40:53 AM
Bless you, my child

"To be sure, to be sure"   ;D
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: juventus206 on February 28, 2007, 10:40:53 AM
Wow, great way to stay single :*))
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Robmeister on February 28, 2007, 12:25:59 PM
As long as you don't turn into that other Evangelical Dude from Colorado....

Boy that is subtle....but I'm pretty sure I know who yer talking about
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: schro on February 28, 2007, 12:49:22 PM
I thought you'd get it, given the reference to Colorado , nothing more.

It's funny how the press ran all over that evangelical leader (Ted Haggard), but when Charles Rust-Tierny, former president of the Virginia chapter of the ACLU got busted with posessing graphic child porn, the press completely passed on the story.

Sorry to end the levity, but one thing lead to another and there ya go.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: PigPen on February 28, 2007, 02:41:43 PM
Wow, Schro really knows how to kill a topic.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: schro on February 28, 2007, 02:48:32 PM
Yeah sorry Pig, but I'm sure we can get another beer swillin', nekkid breastesses, lezbo thread goin' kwiker than squirrel goin up a tree runnin' from a 'coon dawg.

I reckon, um hmmm.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 03:06:11 PM
Wow, Schro really knows how to kill a topic.

(giggles)  O0
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: PBurke on February 28, 2007, 03:49:48 PM
if that is the best that single guys can doo these days, then i need to be single. i would be a god.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Blagadan on February 28, 2007, 03:51:58 PM
some awesome chat up lines, give these a try.... ;)

Do you have any Irish in you?  No? Would you like some?
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 04:06:04 PM
if that is the best that single guys can doo these days, then i need to be single. i would be a god.

You already are....
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 04:07:28 PM
some awesome chat up lines, give these a try.... ;)

Do you have any Irish in you?  No? Would you like some?

 ::) now that's familiar!!  :D
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Blagadan on February 28, 2007, 04:10:48 PM
So ... ahem ... do you have any Irish in you MBabe?  :D
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: spaceape48 on February 28, 2007, 04:13:25 PM
Anyone heard the George Carlin one about the magic trick? It has to do with something dissapearing and then reapearing again ;)
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 04:18:23 PM
So ... ahem ... do you have any Irish in you MBabe?  :D

not at the moment.... :P
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Blagadan on February 28, 2007, 04:19:09 PM
not at the moment.... :P

lol  ;D
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: schro on February 28, 2007, 04:24:21 PM
So ... ahem ... do you have any Irish in you MBabe?  :D

not at the moment.... :P

Well, let McSchro take care of that for ya, MBabe.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 04:25:57 PM
So ... ahem ... do you have any Irish in you MBabe?  :D

not at the moment.... :P

Well, let McSchro take care of that for ya, MBabe.

(fainted)
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Blagadan on February 28, 2007, 04:27:19 PM
Well, let McSchro take care of that for ya, MBabe.

As shameless as I am, I wasn't forward enough to offer. you dirty dog!  ;D
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Tom McGarry. on February 28, 2007, 04:29:18 PM
if that is the best that single guys can doo these days, then i need to be single. i would be a god.
I thought you were god!
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: PBurke on February 28, 2007, 04:31:52 PM
if that is the best that single guys can doo these days, then i need to be single. i would be a god.
I thought you were god!

 i am.   


is this a joke topic or a contest to see how many ways we can flirt with MB?
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: PigPen on February 28, 2007, 05:39:46 PM
if that is the best that single guys can doo these days, then i need to be single. i would be a god.
I thought you were god!

 i am.   


is this a joke topic or a contest to see how many ways we can flirt with MB?

Yes
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on February 28, 2007, 11:46:10 PM
if that is the best that single guys can doo these days, then i need to be single. i would be a god.
I thought you were god!

 i am.   


is this a joke topic or a contest to see how many ways we can flirt with MB?

Yes

PMSL, you tell 'im Pigpen!   :D
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: PigPen on March 01, 2007, 07:30:12 AM
if that is the best that single guys can doo these days, then i need to be single. i would be a god.
I thought you were god!

 i am.   


is this a joke topic or a contest to see how many ways we can flirt with MB?

Yes

PMSL, you tell 'im Pigpen!   :D

OK....I thought I just did......I'm lost  ???
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Ian on March 12, 2007, 12:07:22 PM
Heres one for you

1:Do you have spanners in yours eyes?

2:Why?

1:Cause every time i look at you my nuts tighten......

 :-[
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: flattop peterbilt on March 12, 2007, 10:32:52 PM
ok two i had never heard but most i have and some were very corny....
I used the straight forward aproach..
I could buy you drinks all night try and make you think i am a nice guy and all but we could get a twellve pack go back to my place save me 40 too 60 bucks and just have sex ..what do you say....lol   It really does work.....If that is what the female is out for....if not they get pissed and walk away....but hey what are most guys out for ...surely not a wife...lol
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Tyler on March 12, 2007, 10:34:48 PM
ok two i had never heard but most i have and some were very corny....
I used the straight forward aproach..
I could buy you drinks all night try and make you think i am a nice guy and all but we could get a twellve pack go back to my place save me 40 too 60 bucks and just have sex ..what do you say....lol   It really does work.....If that is what the female is out for....if not they get pissed and walk away....but hey what are most guys out for ...surely not a wife...lol

One of my fraternity bros used to use the direct approach everytime we went out.  He took a chick home with him at least 50% of the time and they were always hot.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: PigPen on March 13, 2007, 12:19:22 PM
That's funny right thar, I don't care who ya are
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Vash on March 23, 2007, 03:34:51 AM
Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see!

Baby, I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock!

Are those space pants? 'Cause your ass is out of this world!

Do you have a boyfriend? [No] Want one? [Yes] Well, when you want a MANfriend, come and talk to me.

Come around here often? Would you like to?

Do you want to see something swell?

Excuse me, I'm a little short on cash, would you mind if we shared a cab home together?

Hey babe, wanna make an easy fifty bucks?

I am conducting a field test of how many woman have pierced nipples.

I know I don't look like much now, but I'm drinking milk.

I'd marry your cat just to get in the family.

I've gotta thirst, baby, and you smell like my Gatorade.

My friend and I have a bet that you won't take off you blouse in a public place.

No, I'm not a cop. What can I get for fifty bucks?

Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?

Pardon me, are you in heat?!

Should I call you in the morning or nudge you?

So, you're a girl huh?

Stand back, I'm a doctor. You go get an ambulance, I'll loosen her clothes.

Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy.

Would you like to come over to my place later? You can bring some friends because my face seats five.

You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Not in my case.

You make my software turn to hardware!

You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear.

and my all time favorite bad pick up line....

 ;D “I think I could fall madly in bed with you.”  O0
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: PigPen on March 23, 2007, 07:06:47 AM
Those are hilarious Vash.......I almost spit coffee on the monitor.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: iBald on March 23, 2007, 05:07:56 PM
Line I used with my ex.

First time she saw me sly may I add.


Me: "So you like it"?

Her: "yeah"

Me: "How about the top of it"? (Me tilting my head down)

Her: "Yeah" (while rubbing it)

Me: "Cool, your about to see it between your legs for awhile"
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: RuddyR on April 02, 2007, 02:00:10 PM
i like this one;

• My name is (name)... remember that, you'll be screaming it later.
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Robmeister on April 02, 2007, 05:43:00 PM
How'bout:

"Man, is it hot in here, or is it you?"
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: HotCajun on April 02, 2007, 05:58:01 PM
Had a good one till I read ibald's  :o 


(Imagination can be such a b!t#h)  >:D
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: MagmaBabe on April 03, 2007, 04:54:58 AM
How'bout:

"Man, is it hot in here, or is it you?"

hmm... now why does that sound familiar?  ::)
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: Razor X on April 07, 2007, 05:54:04 PM
What's this - How To Get Your Face Slapped (or worse)?  ;D ;D
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: CutlassS on April 30, 2007, 05:59:39 PM
I said this to my wife when I first met her, way back in the late 60's. You might remember the Old Rowen and Martin's Laugh In  that was on Tv back in the 60's?

The pervert is setting on the park bench and Lily Tomlin sets down by him, she was alaways hitting him with her purse?

He looks over to her and says!

Do you believe in the here after? Lily Tomlin looks at him and says Yes I do, The pervert says to her:

Well then you know what Im here After!!!

I picked my wife up with this line! >:D
Title: Re: For all you single guys....
Post by: RC The Uncola on May 03, 2007, 11:57:31 AM
Do you believe in the here after? Lily Tomlin looks at him and says Yes I do, The pervert says to her:

Well then you know what Im here After!!!

Thats a great one, i think im going to have totry it!