Sly Bald Guys Forum

New Member Section => Introductions => Topic started by: 9mmshooter on June 16, 2009, 02:30:20 PM

Title: lookin for support
Post by: 9mmshooter on June 16, 2009, 02:30:20 PM
I recently joined this site because I am struggling with being 26 and going bald quickly.  I can expect that most of you guys would say to shave it.  I was wondering if anyone else has had trouble accepting their baldness?  Any tips on how I can overcome it?
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: GaryT on June 16, 2009, 02:36:22 PM
What you're going through is perfectly and plenty of guys here have been in the same place!! Tips for dealing with it....well that's sort of up to you. Yes many here will say shave it. I would say that also. But the important thing is that you do what you feel is right for you.

Being "Sly" has much more to do with you're attitude than the length of your hair! Shaving your head just makes a bold statement to those around you.

Keep hangin here and read alll the posts you can. You'll get it!!
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: Papa Don on June 16, 2009, 03:16:51 PM
Shooter, Gary is absolutely correct.  If being completely bald was the only way to go, why do I see so many men with the horseshoe on their heads?  I am Sly because I want to be.  I am confident in my appearance and if someone doesn't like it-too bad.  I am who I am on the inside, a gREAT PERSON.  My appearance has nothing to do with who I am.  In this world today, people are quick to judge a person without knowing them. Look at the (crazy, wierd,bald, tattood Etc) guy over there.  What was he thinking?  I have little time for short sighted morons.
If you are unhappy with the hair loss it is up to you to decide if shaving, plugs, chemicals are right for you.  Whatever you decide, the great members on this site will be behind you 100%. I am sure your family and friends that know you will not desert you regardless of what decision you make.  You are all that you allow yourself to be.  Those that love and know you, realize this.
Just keep saying--"I AM A GREAT PERSON!"
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: Dome of Steele on June 16, 2009, 03:59:07 PM
Are you sly yet? 
It will change your life.  I was 25 when I went sly for the first time. 
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: slyck85 on June 16, 2009, 05:59:33 PM
I had lots of trouble with it myself especially right around the time I graduated from high school and lived with MPB for a long time afterward.  If your still on the fence about going sly, maybe you should try a buzz cut or something similar before actually shaving....I planned out my first head shaving day and took two weeks of vacation just in case I didn't like it.  I ended up cancelling all but 1 day of that vacation and will never go back to the horseshoe look.  Its nice not being tethered to a baseball cap anymore
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: Mikekoz13 on June 16, 2009, 06:46:07 PM
Welcome Shooter! The confidence will come in time. A lot of guys have trouble dealing with MPB. It never bothered me because I didn't give a rat's behind.

Forget about that little bit of hair that is commanding your life. Buzz it short, get comfortable with it, and then shave it off. Walk tall my friend... listen to PapaDon.
Love who you are........

Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: DCdome on June 16, 2009, 07:41:58 PM
Hey Shooter!

The bros are speaking wisdom.  Listen.  Try a buzz....it is a great improvement over any combover you may have.  Ultimately, when you are ready, you will shave the noggin and you are probably going to love it.  Being sly is a great way of celebrating your masculinity.  8)  But you got to be ready and someday (and I hope it's soon) you will be.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: adam_r_todd on June 16, 2009, 08:25:58 PM
I'm 30.  I wish I would've gone sly so much sooner.  I don't think anyone can talk you through the mental process you have to go through to get there.  But, trust me, it is so worth giving it up and shaving it.  Try it for the summer.  You will love it.   8)
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: dawgfan on June 17, 2009, 04:40:50 AM
I had been talking about shaving my head for several years before I decided to actually go through with it.  My experience, like many others here, is that I wished I hadn't waited so long.  You will find from the many different posts here that an overwelmingly majority of us struggled with the decision to go sly.  Another similarity among us is that most of us, if not all, wish we had taken the plung much earlier!  Hopefully all of the messages here will provide you with enough information / support to make your decision.  I think we're probably a little bit biased though towards the sly side.  O0

Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: TANK25 on June 17, 2009, 06:56:02 AM
Welcome bro,I hope the forum helps you deal with the changes you are going through.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: yak on June 17, 2009, 07:48:21 AM
Shooter put the 9 down it's not that bad....


In high school I was much like Zach Morris from Saved by the Bell - in terms of hair at least.  It was always in place, loads of hairspray and gels, what a goof i was back then... anyways my hair was something, perfect....  I go off to college and by the time i hit my 19 birthday I was staring at a major bald spot.  Nocked it down to a razor with no gaurd for about a year and then went sly. I can tell you that it doesn't take long for the confidence to come back after you get ride of the rest of the hair.  As long as you have hair with a bald spot people see you as balding, older, whatever.   Keep it slick and people show you respect. 



Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: Timmay on June 17, 2009, 08:00:11 AM
9mm, welcome to the site.  This is a great place to expand your knowledge.  You will learn alot in here and hope you take the time to read thru the threads.  This is bascially a site where most of us guys shave our heads so it is natural for us to just tell you to shave it.  Just remember , it's all about you and waht makes you feel good about yourself. 

A few months ago I post up a thread that I think sums it all up.  Please read the following, I think it will help you out alot.  I could direct you to the thread but I will repost it here...just for you bud.  Enjoy

There are many who fear loosing their hair, afraid of what the world will think of them if they shave it off.  Im here to tell you that no matter what the world says, the only thing that matters is how you feel about yourself and what makes you happy.  What follows here not only applies to ourselves but can be useful to those around us.

The number one thing is to ACCEPT.  Accept others for who they are and for their choices they have made even if you have difficulty understanding their beliefs. We are all here to serve a purpose, it just may not be the same purpose that you and I are here to serve.  Decide that you will be successful and happy what ever may come your way, and with what ever it is, you will find happiness in that. The roadblocks are only minor obstacles along the way.  Use your abilites to the best of your knowledge. I have heard some guys say that they will feel incomplete without hair. Talent that is wasted has no value.  Talent that is used will bring unexpected rewards.  Do not feel as though you can not do something because of your hair loss.

Too many times we hear negative comments from people. Ignore that and focus instead on your goals and remember your accomplishments.  When you do hear negative comments do the F( squared) Forgive and Forget.  Grudges only weigh you down and leads you to unhappiness and grief.  People alot of times say things without thinking.  As Tyler mentioned...sometimes Timmays fingers work before connecting to the Brain.  We all fall to that at times, but life is a journey, a journey to new worlds, new possiblities and to keep an open mind.  Try to learn different things everyday  and you will grow.  If you have questions, please ask.  You are here in this forum to learn and to have fun.  If you dont ask, sometimes you may never know.  No question is ever dumb or stupid. 

Leave those childhood monsters behind.  The fear of what people will say if you shave your head, with confidence that you build up inside yourself, their words can no longer hurt, harm or stand in your way.  People will only throw these things if you show to them that you are weak.  Notice people who are helpless, weak or suffering and assists them if you can.  By going out of your comfort zone you will show them that you are strong, that you can take on the world no matter what is thrown your way. Share your talents, skills, knowledge and time with others.  Everything you invest in others will return to you many times over.

Most of all, create a family of friends with who you can share your hopes, dreams, sorrows and happiness with.  Value the friends and family members who have supported and encouraged you, and be there for them as well.  There may even be times when someone says something negative towards you but take a deep look inside that person and you will find the goodness in them, we are not all perfect.  Just keep in mind that you have to work hard  everyday  to be the best person you can be , but never feel guilty if you fall short of your goals.  It is allowed to screw up every now and then.  It doesnt make you less of a person.

As the world is today there is alot of stress. With the economy the way it is, people are sitting on unstable ground. They do not know what is to come or how things are going to be when they wake up the next day.  We all have to make adjustments within our own means.  Keep things within a reasonable reach.  I know this may be tough, but we need to relax. Refuse to let worry  and stress rule our daily lives, and remember that things always have a way of working out in the end.

Most importantly..Play.  Never forget to have fun along the way. Success means nothing without happiness.  Enjoy your time here and make as many friends as possible.  There is no limit on the amount of friends you can have.  Yield to commitment.  If you stay on track  and remain dedicated, you will find success at the end of the road.  We soemtimes fall off the path that life leads us down.  Thats ok, explore all possiblities, most things are not permenant, you can change your mistakes. When the bad memories and sorrow rears its ugly head, just remember your happy place ( SBG's).  Let nothing interfere with your goals.  Instead , focus on your abilities , your dreams and a brighter tomorrow!

Give SBG's a chance to make a difference in your life.  We are here to help you come to terms with the issues on top.  Shaving your noggin may not be the answer for all of us, but we all are here for one purpose, Friendship and Guidance.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: 9mmshooter on June 17, 2009, 08:46:33 AM
Guys, thanks for the advice.  I am just having a hard time right now.  I'm the only male in my family to loose their hair, and at just 26 on top of that.  I am having a hard time accepting it, but at the same time, I don't really guess I have another option.  I've spent the last little while depressed and thinking that my life as I knew it is pretty much over.  I've looked into medication and pluggs, but have heard very negative things about both.  I guess I'll get over it with time.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: HoodooMan on June 17, 2009, 10:06:00 AM
9,
I understand what you're going through. i'm 24 and shaved. i started balding/ thinning badly at around 19. i am the only male in my immediate, as well as extended family to go bald. buzz down to a #2, then 1, then razor if you wish. trust me, even just buzzing real short makes you feel much better! i went through the whole "oh man, women won't find me attractive!" phase. but trust me it hasn't affected my game being bald. i thought i would, but it hasn't. buzz or shave it down, and you'll slowly get used to your new look, gain confidence, and be your old self minus the hair! it takes awhile to get used to, but it's better than sitting around depressed all day!! you WILL learn to love it, and yourself again
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: SlyHigh on June 17, 2009, 10:12:32 AM
I've never cared if I lost my hair or not.  It's just hair.  Every man will lose hair.  Most will lost nearly all of it.  I personally don't see how it changes anyone's lives (but I know many men don't feel the way I do).  People may make jokes about it to you, but if they really were bothered by you losing hair, they are being superficial, and it's their problem.

Being shaved is perfectly acceptable.  So what if you are losing your hair?  It's not like you can help it.

The thing to do is to accept it.  If you try to hide it, by either styling your hair different, plugs, drugs, or rugs, people will notice that you are trying to hide it.  If I see a man who's balding, I don't think anything of it.  When I see a man try to hide it, my opinion of him goes negative.

If you aren't ready to shave, just start cutting it shorter.  The longer it is, the more obvious balding is.  If you are afraid of drastic change and people's reactions, just gradually keep cutting it shorter over time.  People will comment on newly slick heads, but they aren't being negative.  Sure, some guys look better with hair.  But losing it and shaving looks fine.  Often shaved heads look better than a head full of hair.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: ShavedForNow on June 17, 2009, 11:05:37 AM
For what it's worth, I've never seen a guy who doesn't look better shaved than he did with a balding pattern.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: ice4life on June 17, 2009, 11:28:19 AM
Welcome aboard man O:O
I noticed my hair thinning back in high school, and it never bothered me. Since you are struggling with it, try a buzz cut, like the guys have said. when you get used to it, you can shave the rest if you choose. I love being sly, and I think everybody on here would tell you the same. Whatever you decide, we'll be here to help!

 Ice
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: bem75 on June 17, 2009, 12:50:57 PM
Welcome.  You're here.  So, you obviously see shaving your head as the best solution to balding.  Honestly, you're lucky that you recognize the issue and that you know the solution.  I am so happy that I shaved and I get compliments like never before.  In the last four months, I have gotten more compliments than I had gotten in the previous 10 years.  That is no joke, either.

I know that you're taking advice from a bunch of guys who shave their heads, but it is good advice.

Remember the old saying, "If I only knew then, what I know now"?  Well, we know...and we're telling you.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: flatdave on June 17, 2009, 02:06:45 PM
Welcome 9mm!  I can't give you any advice on accepting baldness because I'm bald by choice.  However, there are plenty of other SLY guys here that can tell you there stories.  I wish you the best of luck and we all hope to see you on the SLY side soon.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: ice4life on June 17, 2009, 02:10:33 PM
I do have one question for ya bro. What made you decide on a 9mm? are you a L.E.O.?
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: stasiu on June 18, 2009, 09:26:53 PM
Age 26 and tips to overcome MPB?  Are you lucky and have a full-time job?   Then concentrate and excell in performance, not hairloss. Are you underemployed and looking for a job?  Then wear your remaining hair buzzed short for that "smart look" to give more confidence.  Are you fully employed and looking for that special "mate" and that bald crown or receding "V" hairline got you down?  Work out, feel comfortable with the hairloss and wear it short or razor the melon smooth.   Still undecided?  Try spending $3,000.00 for HCM contract or other viable hair replacement venue.   Only you can make yourself happy and SBG supports you !
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: buddha on June 19, 2009, 01:06:16 AM
I've spent the last little while depressed and thinking that my life as I knew it is pretty much over. 

Every day I wake up I realize that life, as I knew it, is pretty much over. This just means that every day is a new day.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: Wil87 on June 19, 2009, 04:27:22 AM
Age 26 and tips to overcome MPB?  Are you lucky and have a full-time job?   Then concentrate and excell in performance, not hairloss. Are you underemployed and looking for a job?  Then wear your remaining hair buzzed short for that "smart look" to give more confidence.  Are you fully employed and looking for that special "mate" and that bald crown or receding "V" hairline got you down?  Work out, feel comfortable with the hairloss and wear it short or razor the melon smooth.   Still undecided?  Try spending $3,000.00 for HCM contract or other viable hair replacement venue.   Only you can make yourself happy and SBG supports you !

Is this a serious post ??
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: R o b 6 on June 23, 2009, 06:41:42 AM
I've never cared if I lost my hair or not.  It's just hair.  Every man will lose hair.  Most will lost nearly all of it.  I personally don't see how it changes anyone's lives (but I know many men don't feel the way I do).  People may make jokes about it to you, but if they really were bothered by you losing hair, they are being superficial, and it's their problem.

Being shaved is perfectly acceptable.  So what if you are losing your hair?  It's not like you can help it.

The thing to do is to accept it.  If you try to hide it, by either styling your hair different, plugs, drugs, or rugs, people will notice that you are trying to hide it.  If I see a man who's balding, I don't think anything of it.  When I see a man try to hide it, my opinion of him goes negative.

If you aren't ready to shave, just start cutting it shorter.  The longer it is, the more obvious balding is.  If you are afraid of drastic change and people's reactions, just gradually keep cutting it shorter over time.  People will comment on newly slick heads, but they aren't being negative.  Sure, some guys look better with hair.  But losing it and shaving looks fine.  Often shaved heads look better than a head full of hair.


Great post, SlyHigh. Wise observations...ditto!
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: D.A.L.U.I. on June 23, 2009, 08:52:08 AM
9MM you can read through the old posts and find that almost all the guys that lose their hair have some degree of anxiety about it, some are really obsessed with it.  Ohers care, but it's not the major force in their life.  But for ALL who decide to try the Sly totally shaved head for thirty days usually have two responses, they stay sly and two, wonder why they waited so long.
I can assure you at whatever age you do it, you'll find that no one, not one, ever said how good your receding hairline or combover looked, much less comment on how sexually attractive it made you.  That is a common response to a shaved head--really.  And it's really nice O0.  When people compliment you you're going to regain your confidence, and you'll again have a more active social life w/ more friends, etc.  Try it for 30 days, you'll have some suprizes, like, "Who's that dude in the mirror?" and a wonderful light numbness, both of these go away pretty quickly, but they're pleasant. 
Try it, you're going to like it, we promise.
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: stoic1975 on June 23, 2009, 11:43:15 AM
Hi 9mm,

I just started shaving a week ago.  I'd been saying for years that if my top thinned any more I was going to shave it.  No one believed me.

Last week, I finally decided to take the plunge.  You know what......I couldn't be happier.  I love the look, the feel, and the attention I seem to get because of it.

Life is too short to worry about what others say.  It took me a long time to figure that out.  but sure glad I did.

You'll find some awesome guys on here.  Just a great bunch of slydudes...:)

Take care,
Brett
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: Thebaldnation on June 26, 2009, 03:43:56 PM
I recently joined this site because I am struggling with being 26 and going bald quickly.  I can expect that most of you guys would say to shave it.  I was wondering if anyone else has had trouble accepting their baldness?  Any tips on how I can overcome it?

Hey shooter, i shaved my head by choice at the age of 21, i had very long long hair and decided one day that enough was enough. Oh and my best friend bet me as well, anyway, i hear your anxiety about loosing your hair and i know that going bald by choice is different than going bald because you are loosing your hair. But trust me listen to all your bald brothers here and take the plunge you will absolutely love it and you will not regret it, remember here at the bald nations best being bald is better than average
Title: Re: lookin for support
Post by: MikeInPdx on June 26, 2009, 04:02:08 PM
There's a lot of good advice here....particularly giving yourself time to get comfortable.

I started thinning noticeably at 21 and shaved at 30. Now I'm 41 and it's really not a big deal.....but it took a while to get to the point where I didn't care if I had hair or not. Be kind to yourself on the journey. :)