Sly Bald Guys Forum

Confidence and Success => Relationships/Dating => Topic started by: JayneDough on September 22, 2018, 09:35:48 AM

Title: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: JayneDough on September 22, 2018, 09:35:48 AM
My boyfriend has been thinning ever since I met him. The problem is, he's too scared to let go of his hair. I think he's self conscious or embarrassed since I've never seen him with it really short. I used to be a bit nervous to bring up the topic because I know it can be a touchy subject, but at this point I really just want him to cut it off. I've told him to get a haircut and even offered to do it for him, but he says no. I thought maybe he never wanted to do it because he wasn't sure how I'd feel about it, but now I've offered and he still doesn't want to. What do I do? I don't want to say anything to hurt his feelings, but I also think he would just look better without the hair at this point. He got so upset last time when I tried to cut it, that now I'm too nervous to even bring it up again.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: reddog on September 22, 2018, 02:23:08 PM
Let it go, it's his decision.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: scooby on September 22, 2018, 02:51:14 PM
have him look at some pictures and read some of the stories on this website,that might help him,if it doesnt then hes not ready and you should let it go until hes ready.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: JayneDough on September 22, 2018, 04:47:07 PM
I'm definitely not trying to give him an ultimatum or even saying it all has to go. But it really bugs me, even if he could take it really short that would be an improvement. And I know it's not easy for guys, but I just thought hearing it from me might give him a little boost to go through with it. And I never try to force him to do it, I just try to bring it up politely to make him think about it, I never even mention the baldness. I simply say his hair is getting a little long and he could use a haircut. Wouldn't you guys let your significant other know if there was something they should do to improve themselves even if it is a touchy subject? Am I being mean? I do like the idea of him reading up about it on this site, but I don't know if he's in denial of going bald.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: Sciguy68 on September 22, 2018, 06:20:43 PM
I had a head full of hair and then my widow's peak got higher and higher so I decided to buzz it all off with a #2 guard, then I went to a #1 guard. After a few months, I had my head shaved without a guard and then I went home and shaved it all.off. I haven't looked back since, it's been 3 years.  I shave every day, love the smooth feeling and I get lots of compliments on how I look younger with a bald head since my head full of hair was very gray. He could always try it, it will grow back if he doesn't like the look or feel of a bald head.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: Magoo on September 22, 2018, 06:25:53 PM
You can suggest he give shaving a try . But don’t push the issue, it might not be something he’s willing  to try.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: JayneDough on September 22, 2018, 08:09:15 PM
Then, I guess I'll suggest it one more time and if he says no I'll hint at it once in a while. I wish he would try it at least once and if he didn't like it I'd drop it. But I think once he makes the change he'll wish he had done it sooner. I just have to help him get there and see that it's no big deal. After all, he has no one to impress but me lol
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: nuts on September 22, 2018, 09:07:46 PM
Don't push it.  You might think it is only you but he is probably concerned about friends, workmates etc and how they might react.  Softly, softly and he will probably come round.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: JayneDough on September 22, 2018, 09:51:00 PM
Yes, this is a concern of mine, probably the biggest reason I would like for him to go through with it. I have seen and heard people sort of pick on him for it, I know they are guys and think it's a bit of banter, but no way does he find it funny. I know it'll be a big confidence booster. Like I said, I would prefer it gone, but I know better than to be pushy about it. I would just like to hint at it subtly and help him feel like it's not something to be afraid of. Heck, I'd cut all my hair off if it made him feel better.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: Blagadan on September 23, 2018, 04:32:58 AM
Perhaps casually drop it in while playing with his hair 'honey have you ever thought about shaving your hair. I think you'd look hot, like Bruce Willis'

It's his decision alone. He likely has fears so work to allay those fears by saying how hot he'd look, how he has a nice shaped head, how it would suit his face etc. But don't push or bring it up again if he says no. Let him come around.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: professor on September 23, 2018, 06:39:16 AM
 If you were married you could probably get away with a strong suggestion, since you are only dating tread lightly.  It is a sensitive subject to him and he is most likely becoming more self conscious every time you mention it.  It would be different if he mentioned it to you and asked for your opinion..
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: Laser Man on September 23, 2018, 01:31:49 PM
Trying to change each other is a very sensitive aspect of a relationship - even in a long-term relationship, and seeking a change that can radically alter a person's appearance is particularly sensitive.  If your boyfriend is getting a lot of jokes about losing his hair from his friends, he's probably hypersensitive about the topic, as evidenced by the fact that he won't even discuss it when you bring it up. Chances are if you keep pushing the subject, he's going to become upset with you because he's simply not ready to even consider a short haircut, let alone a fully shaved head.

My advice: casually mention that you like short hair and shaved heads occasionally, but don't do it to often or forcefully. If you see bald actors, point out that you think they look good.  Give him time and he may come around.

Good luck!
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: JayneDough on September 23, 2018, 11:55:34 PM
Thank you for all the great advice and suggestions, feel free to post or PM me, more thoughts are always welcome. I have yet to bring it up, not sure how soon I will. It's been almost 2 months since I have mentioned it to him, so maybe I'll wait a little longer before bringing up the topic again.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: StillLurking on September 26, 2018, 02:53:14 PM
If I'm not to late to comment, I'd like to put on my "Dear Abby" hat and offer an opinion:  You ask "Wouldn't you guys let your significant other know if there was something they should do to improve themselves...?"  But "improvement" is very subjective.  Some ladies may find the balding look more attractive than a full head of hair or a bald head.  Shaving your head isn't a right or wrong issue; it's cosmetic.  It's a preference issue.

I've noticed a lot of ladies date someone who they genuinely like, except for one are more "small issues."  So the ladies try to "fix" their boyfriend rather than leave him.  After all, he's a great guy except for (whatever).  Perhaps a better solution is to leave him free to find a lady who accepts him as is, and let yourself free to find someone you can accept as is.  Embrace him as he is and let the issue go, or let him go. 

And no, it is not necessarily superficial or mean to let this be a factor in deciding the future of your relationship.  It's easy to sound grand and preach "a decent person looks beyond the physical..." but come on.  Hearts don't really work that way and you KNOW what does and doesn't ignite that flame for you.  You get to choose whom you date and you have the right to set whatever preferences you chose.  Your heart, your choice.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: JayneDough on September 26, 2018, 03:50:59 PM
Ermm... not so sure I'd want to break up with him over something so silly...? We haven't been together for only a few weeks, it's been a couple years. Which I know may not be very long, but I wouldn't want to end a relationship over that, of all things.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: slybeard on September 26, 2018, 04:22:20 PM
So, if we reversed it, and he wanted to shave, but you want him to keep his thinning hair, what should he do?  This is the most common way we hear it.  It really has to be what he wants, rather others think shaving would look better or not.  It is OK to make a suggestion, but after that it becomes nagging if you continue.  He could just dig in and never shave if he thinks it has become nagging.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: JayneDough on September 26, 2018, 06:31:31 PM
Well, I certainly am NOT nagging him, considering I have only suggested for him to cut his hair a couple times. I don't bring it up daily, I don't even say it has to be done or completely buzzed off. Secondly, sure, maybe he wants to keep it. But there's no harm in trying something once. If he did shave it all off and then decided that he hated it, I could live with that. I think he'd look better without it and if he gave it a try, he probably would too.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: chgobuzzbald on September 29, 2018, 12:14:24 AM
Why not just really communicate, which is necessary for any relationship to last. Meaning that the look of him buzzed or shaved is a turn on for you, just state it that way. Make the haircut a sort of foreplay and take it form there. Once he associates great sex with a buzzed/shaved head and that you love it, well what more can he want.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: JayneDough on September 29, 2018, 08:50:43 AM
Hmm... straightforward is the one thing I really haven't tried or put much thought into because I've always been nervous about hurting his feelings lol but if there is a reward system then maybe he'll be more inclined to do it. That's not a bad idea!
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: scooby on September 29, 2018, 01:31:32 PM
try asking him how he feels after someone comments how his hair is thinning and take it from their.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: Miller1989 on October 03, 2018, 01:57:31 PM
Have you tried mentioning how much you like shorter haircuts and shaved heads? Maybe you should try and encourage him to go for a shorter style first. That way he'll get used to sporting less hair on his head and may be more comfortable about taking it all off later on. And having a loving, supportive girlfriend will help him. I think every guy is at least a little nervous about shaving his head the first time. All of the women in my life, including family, were very supportive. All said that I had nothing to worry about and would look handsome bald. Turns out,, they were right!
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: chrisphilly123 on March 31, 2019, 11:29:08 AM
try asking him how he feels after someone comments how his hair is thinning and take it from their.
Or compliment someone who is shaved bald while you're in public. That shouldn't be too hard to do.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: Rusty Shackleford on December 28, 2020, 12:37:22 PM
My boyfriend has been thinning ever since I met him. The problem is, he's too scared to let go of his hair. I think he's self conscious or embarrassed since I've never seen him with it really short. I used to be a bit nervous to bring up the topic because I know it can be a touchy subject, but at this point I really just want him to cut it off. I've told him to get a haircut and even offered to do it for him, but he says no. I thought maybe he never wanted to do it because he wasn't sure how I'd feel about it, but now I've offered and he still doesn't want to. What do I do? I don't want to say anything to hurt his feelings, but I also think he would just look better without the hair at this point. He got so upset last time when I tried to cut it, that now I'm too nervous to even bring it up again.

So you admit that he is nervous, self -conscious, and embarassed and your reaction is to NAG HIM?  You've TOLD HIM to get a haircut, and even offered to pay implying that he can't afford the $15?  Seriously, what on earth is wrong with you?  It's his decision, he knows your opinion, he knows the option is out there.  Drop it.   

He does need to cut something from his life and it's not his hair.

I know this is old, but this just needed to be said in case someone else has the same question in the future.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: Rusty Shackleford on December 28, 2020, 12:50:42 PM
Well, I certainly am NOT nagging him, considering I have only suggested for him to cut his hair a couple times. I don't bring it up daily,

"Suggesting" does not have to be daily to qualify as nagging.  I'm also confident that you are understating the number of times you have "suggested".

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I don't even say it has to be done or completely buzzed off.
So you aren't suggesting, you're demanding?


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Secondly, sure, maybe he wants to keep it. But there's no harm in trying something once.
Your dismissal over his opinion on something that is entirely his decision is very telling on what life with you must be like.


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If he did shave it all off and then decided that he hated it, I could live with that.
I I I I I I I I I I I
me me me me me me me

You have an unbelievably narcissistic attitude.


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I think he'd look better without it and if he gave it a try, he probably would too.
You may be right.  He might look 100x times better.  but IT'S NOT YOUR DECISION.

Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: clint902 on December 29, 2020, 04:33:20 AM
The whole thing sounds petty.  Hey, did he shave it or buzz it yet?  I don't understand why he's so obstinate about it but it he's against doing it then that's the way it is.  I think some guys are like that.
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: Goatee on December 29, 2020, 08:53:00 AM
Do it while he is asleep and tied up! Lol
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: DoberDaddy on December 31, 2020, 02:58:48 AM
@Goatee Kinky monkey!
Title: Re: How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave?
Post by: clint902 on December 31, 2020, 06:55:05 AM
I think doing it against his will would cause your relationship to implode so sometimes it's best to accept what is and leave it alone.