Sly Bald Guys Forum
Confidence and Success => Relationships/Dating => Topic started by: Bald_freak on January 25, 2008, 06:26:54 PM
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The short time that I've been with my wife(4 years) is the only time in my life that I've been truly happy. we get along great and rarely fight or argue. Only twice that I can think of. But, this last 2 and a 1/2 weeks has been pure hell for me and I'm still reeling from it. Over night total personality change. wanted absolutely nothing to do with me, and even kicked me outta the house once. Here's the thing, the last two arguements I knew what the issue was. The first one I screwed up. The second time she did. Here's my question: She has never really been too bad with PMS. She gets a 2 day migriane and wants to sleep alot. No big deal. She doesn't usually lash out or get bitchy. After the Deluge of confusion that had me thinking that my sanity,happyness, and marriage were over, she just walks up to me and says she is sorry and that she loves me. No explanation as to WTF has been wrong with her for the last 20 days or so. The only thing I can figure is this. She stopped taking her birth control a month ago because her script ran out and she hasn't had the time off from work to go to her Gyno to get it renewed. Could abruptly stopping those pills cause that drastic of a mood swing? I'm talking total Jekle and Hyde like change.
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Yeah dude, horomones will do that.
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While I'm only an amateur gynecologist, I would agree that the sudden stoppage of BC is what done it. But my wife is like that pretty much all the time, so what do I know???
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Very likely that the sudden change in hormones from going off the pill would cause your Mrs to go a bit mental. Speaking from experience I changed to one that the hormone levels didn't suit me and I was a psycho bitc* for reals it made me really pissed off and have a super short fuse about everything, once I changed it was all fine - even my Mum noticed and was telling me that there is something wrong with the pill I was on.
Chinese medicine would sort her out quick smart - and all naturally!
Good luck, if she doesn't go back on the pill give her some time - it should even out a little bit.
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Being one that has been married for 15 years...you are going to go thru alot. My wife expirenced that type of mood swing...maybe not as severe as yours has...but its all about the hormones. Its just how the old saying goes..and the ladies will probably agree wiht me here...YOu will never totally understand teh female...and they will never understand us. Its just how the world goes aroudn bro...but trust me on this....hang in there ...and it will pass. Life is like a roller coaster...but lets just hope most of those ups and downs...will be between the sheets! LOL
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....hang in there ...and it will pass. Life is like a roller coaster...but lets just hope most of those ups and downs...will be between the sheets! LOL
that's what i'm talking 'bout. O0
WARHAWK O0
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Freak, I was just going to ask if your wife was pregnant. The reason being is that my wife had about a 2 week episode like that when she was pregnant. I couldn't do ANYTHING right! I couldn't sleep in the same bed or get close to her because I stank, even if I just got out of the shower. It was the weirdest thing ever. Like your wife, she just said sorry and moved on.
I'm guessing it's hormones also. Hopefully it's from the birth control if you aren't planning on having a baby.
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...my wife had about a 2 week episode like that .... I couldn't do ANYTHING right!
I'm guessing it's hormones also. Hopefully it's from the birth control if you aren't planning on having a baby.
Only two weeks? Consider yourself lucky.
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Things are a little better, but she still ain't acting quite right. To answer Ty's question: No more little freaks in our future. Her first pregnancy almost killed her, so Weren't not going to risk that again. I'd rather have one child with my wife than 2 kids and no wife.
Thanks for the imput guys and thanks to Jdogs wife, that puts things into perspective alittle. I knew that BC can affect a gals hormones, I just didn't realize it could be to that degree. Hopefully that's all it is/ was.
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Yes, any meds affecting hormones -- going on or off or adjustments on dosages can really cause significant mood swings. Don't be too afraid to talk to her about what you're seeing and how you wonder if it has something to do with her coming off the medication. It's much easier being a guy. By the way, Tyler, everything IS your fault; I thought you would have figured that out by now. It's in that marriage book that you're not given until after the honeymoon. I think it's in the chapter after the one entitled, 'Yes Dear, Whatever You Say Dear.' ;D
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By the way, Tyler, everything IS your fault; I thought you would have figured that out by now. It's in that marriage book that you're not given until after the honeymoon. I think it's in the chapter after the one entitled, 'Yes Dear, Whatever You Say Dear.' ;D
Sounds like something that's buried in the fine print -- sort of like a cell phone contract where you have no idea until it's too late that if you call the customer service line for any reason at all, it will result in them restarting your two-year contract and any attempt on your part to get out of it will result in a hefty penalty. :-\
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Schro - Yeah, from what I heard I was lucky that it was only 2 weeks.
Stu - I read that chapter, but I try to forget about it hoping that if I do so it doesn't really exist.
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The pills can DEFINITELY affect mood and personality. The best thing to do is be patient and above all else, stay calm. Don't respond to anger with anger, it's like gas on a fire.
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Update: and it's not a good one. My wife told me today that we're through and she wants either me or her parents to take care of our son. My life has gone to sh*t, and she won't even give me a reason why. I love her so much and this is totally coming outta left field. This is definately the lowest I've ever felt in my life. If I have to move out I might not be on here for a while( PC account is in here name), but until then I'll keep my bald extended family up to date. I've been through worse, but this hurts so so much more. I greatly appreciate everyone's sincere advice.
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Dan, Both you and your wife are in my prayers.
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Really sorry to hear that bro. In my thoughts and prayers as well. Will she consider counseling? To come from out of left field like that and be willing to give up your son, sounds like there is something far greater bothering her.
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Very sorry to hear that. I hope for the best for you and remember, your bald brothers are always here for support.
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Very sorry to hear that. I hope for the best for you and remember, your bald brothers are always here for support.
Freak I couldn't say it any better I hope for the best for you and the misses and we are here for you brother.
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You are in my thoughts and prayers
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I'm really sorry to hear this. In my totally non-expert opinion, based on what you've told us, it sounds like she's in a state of depression or has something else wrong with her. Have you talked to her parents? It sounds like she needs some professional help. Maybe together, you and her parents can persuade her to seek some treatment. If the doctors can help her, maybe then there's a good chance that you can get your relationship back on track. I know that there isn't much any of us here can do but listen and offer sympathy. If you need to talk about it, you know where we are.
Best of luck.
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Bald_Freak, I guess I will be the one to say it but 9 out of 10 times a woman is willing to give her child up is because she met someone and the child is gonna get in the way.
Protect your ass and get legal advice and custody of your son asap. You need to lookout for yourself and your son first, no matter how much you love her. Somethings not adding up and you have to look at the signs, one minute she wants nothing to do with you cause shes planning something, then the uncertainty sets in and she all of a sudden loves you again. It could be a mental thing but that is more a reason the protect yourself and your son first, then you can seek medical help for her if its the case.
If anyone leaves it needs to be her, keep your home and your son. It will help your child in dealing with a seperation if he remains in a familiar environment,and as I stated he needs to be your main concern.
Talk with her parents if you have a good relationship with them, but be cautious of their intentions.
Hang in there, and feel free to PM me if I make any sense and you want to discuss.
As always we are all here to help a brother out.
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I hate to sound cold, but I agree with Champ. Something is going on. A woman who is willing to give up a child has something else going on. My wife would wade through hell with a stick before giving up one of her children.
I'm praying for you, and your family.
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I agree with Gaslick and Champ..... I've been thru this myself in the past.
Good advice by Champ to NOT leave...... keep your child in your home with you. If you leave, you stand to lose everything you don't take with you. hang tough my brother.
Prayers for you and your family....
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Hey Dan, sorry to hear about what you're going through, I can only imagine it must hurt like hell. But I do agree with champ, ga and mike. You gotta stay strong for yourself and for your son, bro. I wish you the best and keep us posted if you can. We're here for you.
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dan....i'm just now reading your latest update. i just want 2 let ya know that U will b in my prayers during this difficult time. i pray that God will give U strength 2 make it thru this & strength 2 B there 4 your son. take care & remember that your sly brahs R here 4 U. give me a pm anytime. take care.
WARHAWK O0
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Dan, hang in there buddy. I know this can be very rough. Champ gave some very sound advice. Sounds like the voice of experience too.
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Dan, hate to say it, but I think Champ, GASlick, Mike & XNY might be onto something. I can't imagine a scenario where a woman would voluntarily give up her child without there being someone else in the picture. This is totally out of the norm and (from what it sounds), a complete blindside. Champ's advice is rock solid...protect yourself legally (for some reason, it doesn't sound like she's on solid footing in this case) and gain custody of your son.
It does still sound like you love her, so maybe there's still hope to reconcile.
We're here if you need us.
Schro
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Its been 7 days and Bald_Freak hasn't posted. I hope the Bro is doing ok... :-\
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Its been 7 days and Bald_Freak hasn't posted. I hope the Bro is doing ok... :-\
I was on yesterday and was thinking the same thing. I really hope he's getting along and ok.
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Sorry to make you fellas worry, I was pc less for a few days(wife has been hiding up in the room, which is where the computer is) I'm at my Dad's now. I've been here since Saturday. I've calmed down a little. The last 2 days before the move were the lowest I've ever been in my life. If it wasn't for the complete out pour of support from you guys, myspace friends, family, and co workers I don't know if I'd made it with out winding up in a straight jacket.(I spent time in a rubber room years ago). I'm slowly accepting that I need to move on. And having a few cute lay days smile at me up here has help boost my decimated ego a little. I've talked to TimmJ right before the move on phone. He's goofy on here, but I'll tell you what, he's one good hearted dude. O0
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glad your doin better bro.
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Great that you posted up to let us know how you're doing. Hang in there bro, will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
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I'm glad to hear form you brother, I've been wondering if you were ok, I'm glad your in the begining stages of getting through this. You are in my thoughts and prayers Brother.
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Sorry to make you fellas worry, I was pc less for a few days(wife has been hiding up in the room, which is where the computer is) I'm at my Dad's now. I've been here since Saturday. I've calmed down a little. The last 2 days before the move were the lowest I've ever been in my life. If it wasn't for the complete out pour of support from you guys, myspace friends, family, and co workers I don't know if I'd made it with out winding up in a straight jacket.(I spent time in a rubber room years ago). I'm slowly accepting that I need to move on. And having a few cute lay days smile at me up here has help boost my decimated ego a little. I've talked to TimmJ right before the move on phone. He's goofy on here, but I'll tell you what, he's one good hearted dude. O0
I appreciate that comment very much Baldfreak. I just hope that everyone realizes that in person Im a good hearted person and that if there is a chance we ever meet up I hope you all arent disappointed........I am fun to be around but when seriousness is called....im there. I support you all in here. Even though I havent meet any of you except for one and have talked to a few on the phone, I actually do pray for every single one of you in here. I am glad to have what I have in here. I have been especially praying hard for my friend BaldFreak. It has got to be one of the toughest times in his life that he is ever gonna have to deal with. I have been praying that he holds strong thru this whole situation. Even though things may look dark for him in the future.....but there is light in the end. May God give him the strength to stay strong for his son. The little guys are the ones who take in more than we think they do. I hope they both are going to be protected and things that they need to make it from day to day will be provided for them.
Hang in there Buddy, and remember Im only a phone call away. See ya
Timmayy!
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Good to see you post bald_freak. Ego boost is great...but hold back until things are ironed out. You don't need the added pressure yet...plenty of time for that later...trust me >:D
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Glad to hear from you bald_freak and I'm glad to hear you're feeling a little better. You will get through this. Just stay strong and get yourself a good lawyer.
Andrew
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Dan I have been there man, it is tough. I lost my kids in a long expensive custody battle and only get to see them a couple times a year. I wish I could have full custody of them. Tough times make you a better person though. This will be a positive experience sooner or later
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Man, we're all relieved that you're doing better. Hang tough, pray hard, and be thankful for what you do have.
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Dan, glad to hear you are doing better. I cant imagine what you must be going through and my best wishes are with you and your little one.
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I'll keep on saying, you guys a great. I'm not stupid enough to even consider another serious relationship yet. I'm move pretty slow anyways. I aim for friendship first, then if it grows into something serious great, if not that's just one more friend to my network of support. I'm an odd feller, which is a turn on for some gals and a turn off for others. But, I'm a good guy and easy to get along with for those who are willing to give me a chance.
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Glad you're making your way through it Dan. Let us know if there is anything else we can do for ya.
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Dan, You're in my thoughts and prayers. Just let us know if you need anything.
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Just your post now Dan, I hope your doing ok, and I know its super hard to see the light right now, but something bigger and better is wating for you. Maybe you missed some signs that something was not right earlier but either way you deserve nothing but the best - and if she cant give you that then SHE ISNT good enough for you.
I guess the most important thing right now is protecting your child - would be a pretty confusing time.
Take care mate.
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Dan, good to hear you sounding better. Keep up the positive attitude and you'll get through it. Better to realize things sooner than later. Think of your son first, that should be what you want to get straight right from the get go.
I feel for you, and wouldn't ever want to go through it myself.
As the bro's and I have said, we're here for you.