Author Topic: Politically Correct  (Read 1016 times)

Offline D.A.L.U.I.

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Politically Correct
« on: April 29, 2008, 12:05:10 PM »

 

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America, Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as "HILLBILLIES."



You must now refer to them as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.

 
 

And furthermore...

 
 

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

 
 

1 She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."

 
 

2. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

 
 

3. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

 
 

4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

 
 

5 She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

 
 

6. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."

 
 

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

 
 

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

 
 

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

 
 

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."

 
 

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

 
 

5. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."




6. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE."


 



Offline PigPen

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Re: Politically Correct
« Reply #1 on: April 29, 2008, 12:34:15 PM »
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA I like it saint!
In a bacon and eggs breakfast, the chicken is involved, but the pig is committed. BE THE PIG!!!




Offline Timmay

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Re: Politically Correct
« Reply #2 on: April 29, 2008, 12:41:15 PM »
Hmmmm those might come in handy..lol
Timmay

Offline Marz

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Re: Politically Correct
« Reply #3 on: April 29, 2008, 12:55:07 PM »
He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."


HAHA!! I love it!
“If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.”

Offline Paul

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Re: Politically Correct
« Reply #4 on: April 29, 2008, 02:02:19 PM »
Definitely some useable material there, great find saint. :*))
"...and I--I took the road less traveled by, and that has made all the difference."  Robert Frost

Offline PBurke

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Re: Politically Correct
« Reply #5 on: April 29, 2008, 02:13:24 PM »
ggod one


Treat people with respect, or just ignore them!

Offline JDog

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Re: Politically Correct
« Reply #6 on: April 29, 2008, 06:17:56 PM »
saintc I'll be stealing some of those lines and using them here at work. Well done