The past ...Hair and my regrets

[kerryman]

Ok .just had one of those days where i feel completely crappy . This isn't a moan i'm just using this as a place to vent my feelings . I saw one of my old close friends out to day and we both ignored each other . No we didn't fall out but when i was losing my hair (six years ago) i cut myself off from so many people through a complete collapse of confidence .I literally pushed people away when i got invites i turned them down .I'm sure at the time they probably thought "what a stuck up so and so but i wasn't. My hairloss at the time consumed me . I was always worried would people notice ,would they make fun of me ?. I'm sure now looking back they couldn't care less .To day i am bald and proud but i lost a lot of close mates at the time by becoming cold and distant . Maybe i had depression at the time because i remember my hairloss consumed me morning noon and night .Instead of enjoying my early 20s  i was saving for a "miracle hair transplant". When i was asked to go places or to music events i said no .Basically i'm just regretting not accepting who i was in my early 20s. i could   have saved myself  so much hassle with the swipe of a blade.I will be 30 on september the 23rd and i am proud to be bald .I just wish when i was a young and vulnerable that i had seen this site. I'm just pissed that i ruined relationships by losing my confidence over a bit of hair .       

[Semi-Sly]

We have a saying in a group that I belong to that goes something like; "If you stand with one foot in yesterday regretting the past, and the other foot in tomorrow worrying about what to do with that; then you are pissing all over today!"

The thing is, that you shouldn't waste a single moment worrying about what us already in the past and done with, or what you "coulda-woulda-shouda" done differently.  If you do that; you are wasting double the time!.

So go forward.  Just "do the next right thing".  Cherish the moments that you have today and make the most of them.  If you do this, chances are that 30 years from now you will have more close friends than any of your former "close friends". 

 

[Sir Harry]

Kerryman, that was great of you to share your story. I see that you went all the way, and with the shave, you actually could pass for 25 years old. The good thing is, you are still young and can still make plenty of of new friends who probably wouldn't care about your hsir. Once again, thanks for sharing.

[jbrit25]

We've all done some dumb things in life. In my experience, nothing is more freeing than saying I'm sorry. Even if the other party blows you off, its on them, not you. You are pulling off sly better than just about anyone in this place. The confidence should be overflowing. Its also possible that this confidence may have made you a little unrecognizable to the old friend.

[Mr Jules]

You're not alone. We've all had regrets. Wish we done something sooner. Wish we'd spotted what was going wrong before it was too late.

It's never too late to think about the future.

And you're proud to be bald. It's a good look you.

[reddog]

I'm considerably older than you, and I have learned that true friends will always be friends. I have reconnected with old friends, and they will accept you the way you are. When I shaved my head 3 years ago, I think it made some friends uncomfortable and they avoided me. Now my true friends are still there, that's what counts. Don't live in the past for one minute, because in a blink of an eye, all of a sudden your 60!

[kerryman]

Great advice as always !!.Thanks guys