Hello friends, here is my story.

[JD2725]

Hello everyone my name is Joey, Im 24 years old. Life was great until I turned 22. My grandmother that I was so close to had just died and while dealing with that my girlfriend I was with for 9 years decided to leave me for another guy and get pregnant shortly after. I was so depressed and down I was thinking of committing suicide. My mother I hadn't seen for 4 years convinced me to move back home since she thought it was best for me. So I packed my bags up and moved 500 miles south and left the girl I still love. Shortly after I noticed my hair falling out and of course that made me even more depressed and started freaking out. So I went to the doctor and they all said its most likely stress, it should grow back and btw try some Rogaine. That's when things went really downhill. 2 weeks after putting Rogaine in my hair I noticed handfuls of hair in the shower. I then quit using it. Fast forward 2 years later I've lost about 80% of my hair and have the normal see through hair pattern and just recently buzzed it with a 1 guard trying to get use to it. To be honest I really hate my life. I've distanced myself away from friends and family because I'm losing my hair and everyone always ask how did you lose your hair so fast, I thought u just had a full head of hair. I have no self confidence and im still always depressed about my life. All I want to do is stay inside alone as it makes me feel better not being around people. I went from being the most out going person to the guy nobody knows anymore. Its crazy how one minute you feel like your on top of the world and then the next you feel like your buried under ground. I joined this site so I could have somebody to talk to because other people around me have no idea how I feel inside. Thanks guys..

[Sir Harry]

Welcome, Joey!

Sorry that you had to go through all of this at such a young age. The good thing is that in spite of all of this, you're still young enough to rebound and have a normal, productive life. If people really want to be your friends, how much hair is on your head shouldn't matter...the same applies when it comes to girls. Sometimes, it may just take developing a new circle of friends. What are/were your hobbies before you hit this rough period? Are you in college? On a side note, many people have lost hair when they went through a stressful time in life such as the loss of a close family member or friend or even loss of a job. It's easy for someone not in your shoes to say "Get over it" or get over her, but it's different for the person who has to walk in those shoes. That said, you are among friends here and feel free to vent or whatever we're here to help you get through the tough times regardless whether or not it's hair (loss) related. Good luck!

[TheSlyBear]

There are things that we do not have control over: loved ones passing away, a significant other leaving, and even genetics causing hair loss. These are types of things that life throws in everyone's path. And yes, these kinds of events happen to every one.

What we do have control over is how we deal with those things.

Think of how much of what's going on in your life that you are not liking that are self-imposed. You say you are hiding from people because of your hair loss. That's your choice, and a choice you can reverse. You can choose to get out of your own way.

We all have crap to deal with. For me, I'm short, fat, bald, gay, have poor hearing and eyesight, and my right cheek is completely covered by a red birthmark. I have chosen to let none of this get in the way of my happiness and success, because, when you really get right down to it, none of it really matters.

You can be happy. You can be successful. You can choose to be these things. Or you can choose to hide away because of something as insignificant in the grand scheme of things as hair loss.

I know what path I'd suggest you take.

[Goatee]

Look, life can be hard. Hair loss may seem hard for you, but, think of all those people in the world, millions, who are so much worse off than you! People who are dying of cancer, starvation, pains and suffering etc.

Shave your head. Embrace the cool bald look! Move forward in life and be positive! We all love you buddy. God loves you!!

[Semi-Sly]

I've been in your shoes - suffering from sever depression starting in my 20's.  Got really, really bad and has recurred many time since then. 

I know that you could about vomit when you hear guys say; "you can CHOOSE" how you handle/feel about the sh*t that is happening to you".  I always wanted to choke the life out of people when they said that to me.  But you know what?  In the depths of my depression and having attempted suicide other guys who had been as bad off as I was told me that I had to make a CHOICE - I had to CHOOSE whether or not I was going to live or going to die - but they warned me that in making that choice I had to be willing to deal with consequences and that if I chose like I had better mean it and be WILLING TO GO TO ANY LENGTHS TO MAKE MY LIFE BETTER!.

So, I had to swallow my pride, suck my balls up into my gut, and take life one step at a time.  I had to "MAN UP" and admit that I needed the help of professionals and at times, even medication, to learn how to go on living - and eventually actually earning the POWER to "Choose" like they were telling me I could.

They taught me a prayer which I still pray everyday; "God, grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change, the COURAGE to change the things I can, and the WISDOM to know the difference>"

So, first things first- get some wisdom about what you can and cannot change:

- You cannot change the fact that you have lost some of the most important people in your life - but you can change how you feel about it - you can stop dwelling on the "loss" and start taking comfort in the times you shared together that were really meaningful to both of you.  I lost my Grandmother almost 10 years ago.  I had her with me until she was 94.  I still miss her everyday; but I have wonderful memories of times spent with her and goofy little memories pop into my head out of nowhere and I know that she is still with me!

- You cannot change the fact that you GF left you for another.  That SUCKS!  But you didn't make that choice - she did.  So how can you let it define you?  LEARN from it and move on.  Make better choices in your next relationship and then all that you have learned from this breakup will not have been wasted!

- You cannot change the fact that your hair is falling out.  It may never come back and you can't change that either.  But you most certainly CAN CHANGE THE WAY THAT YOU DEAL WITH IT!  You have the POWER to change this!  So grab a razor full of COURAGE, shave off the scraps, and embrace the POWERFUL NEW YOU!  Feel the rush of testosterone!  Put on some nice cologne, a clean shirt, and go out.  Experience the way people relate to the new, confident you. 

Also, have you ever heard of "ManKind Project".  Look them up on the web and see if there is a chapter near you.  MKP helps ordinary guys like you and me to find their inner man, tap into their inner power, and find inner peace.  Ordinary guys can do extra-ordinary things - they just have to find their own power!

[JD2725]

Thanks everybody for the support and advice. Its feels good to actually talk to somebody about my problems. Going through things like this at such a young age isn't fun especially when you grow up loving life and out of nowhere your just barely getting by. Sometimes I think I do need to go get professional help or take medicine. But then I don't want to live taking medicine my whole life. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to be OK but then the next minute I just feel terrible again. I had my whole life planned out when I was 21. I was just starting tech school, had a great paying job and was going to ask the girl of my dreams to marry me. Life was the best and had no clue it was about to be destroyed. Now im a drop out, working at Walmart and single because I'm a depressed, no confidence 24 year old. Now with hairloss, I just buzz my head with a 1 guard because its just to thin to grow outout but not really use to it yet. Hairloss runs on my dads side, grandpa and both cousins are bald but my dad has a full head of hair go figure. My brother is half way bald but the hair he does have is so thick. He started balding 4 years before me and I'm gonna beat him in just a year and a half. If I was 30-50 years old I wcouldn't care at all but to start losing hair in your 20s is a killer. I've even thought about getting a hair system but is really expensive. Thanks again guys for everything.

[SlyMike]

I started losing my hair when I was 19 and it was a lot of stress for me then, however I managed to cope without it until a few years back and only recently did I go down the short buzz/shaving route, incidentally I just asked my wife if she noticed that I didn't have much hair when we met and she said that she didn't notice it, anyone who won't go out with you because of your appearance is just shallow.

My advice is to give the short buzz a try and own the baldness, and be confident with it, you will get much further than worrying about it.

I would also advise that you should take your tablets too, but they are there to help get you out of the depression and get you back on the path to being you.

[JD2725]

Here are 2 photos of me. One right before I started to lose my hair 2 years ago and the other is how I buzz my hair now.

[SlyMike]

I think you look much better with the short buzz, very handsome.

[JD2725]

I think you look much better with the short buzz, very handsome.

Thank you very much.

[tobler1]

I agree.  The buzz is quite becoming on you.  You have a very nice shaped head!

[JD2725]

I agree.  The buzz is quite becoming on you.  You have a very nice shaped head!

Thank you. Just something I have to get use to. Better than my thin hair when it grows out.

[wpruitt]

Welcome.  Looks good!

[Semi-Sly]

Very masculine.  Very confident.  Very mature.  You carry it well!

[Mike E. P.]

You've got a nice face,  The buzz looks really good on you.  I don't know what I was expecting after reading your posts, but it works for you.

I was very depressed over my hair for a long time when I was a young man.  But buzzing my head was the beginning of the end of the worry.  Today I can hardly believe I let that consume me for so long.  Whether you get professional help or not, you can/will get through this.