Confidence and Success > Fitness/Diet

I need some help guys......

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Frontier Guy:
Gearhead, congratulations on several points - first, recognizing the problem and second, having the initiative to take action. And I'll add, third ... don't feel that this is all your doing.

I am usually not a conspiracy theorist; and I'll admit to being a dedicated capitalist

In my view, the problem you're experiencing is nearly global. You hit it right with having increased discretionary income to spend on things (including food). And the last century of modernization and technical advances in food production and distribution has made things available which were previously unheard of. Plus lots of study of people's habits and preferences which markets respond to.

OK, so I'm lots older than you (I'm a "young" 57). The supermarkets of today are so different than in my childhood. Not just bigger with greater selections. Many of the basics are disappearing. I recall the "canned soup" aisle being an entire aisle in the market - versus now it's much less. It's becoming difficult to buy "plain" frozen vegetables. The much greater reliance on packaged foods (which are heavily salted and sugared) versus more basic items. Can you imagine ... I grew up in a time where there was no microwave? Picture a grocery store with all "microwavable" items removed. How many people "make a lunch" to take to work (like a sandwich) versus either getting some fast food item or heating a frozen meal.

I come from dairy-farming lineage. Certainly there were no sweet sodas in the house and thus I never acquired a taste for them. What I've noticed over time is that every few years there is a surge in the amount of sugar and salt in processed foods - acquired tolerance leads to increased desire. If you were to prepare a food from an "old" recipe it will taste very different compared to today's standards. And, if you look at most contemporary recipes they have sweeteners which seem unnecessary. Even toothpastes have sweeteners.

My point? Just recognize that the food industry is working against you and you need to overcome that as well.

There is no solution which will work for every person. You'll have to use 'trial and error' to find what works for you that you can sustain on a long term basis. I constantly struggle with weight, but here's what works for me as long as I stick to it:

* Lots of water as replacement for any other liquids (in my case, coffee)
* Lots of walking - definitely park as far from store entrances as possible; walk up stairs versus the lift/elevator
* Three sensible/small meals every day and possibly a snack if the urge strikes
** Prepare (or at least plan) meals in advance so they are ready - nothing worse than foraging
* No eating after a certain time - for me it's 7:30 in the evening
* Find the food mix which satisfies you without igniting cravings. I'm a "low carb" guy but lots of fiber
* Eat nothing white. (Bread, potatoes, white rice, milk, ice cream, crisps/chips)
* Weigh daily to be mindful of your weight-versus-goal and allow it to influence your day
* View this not as short-term - it is a life change.

Good luck to you. You can do it ... but it takes dedication and perseverance.

Beardman:
Hey bro, you may remember from earlier discussions that I was in a very similar place to you, dang almost 4 years ago now... I was just as big as you and eating just as bad. SO I know exactly where you are coming from, and hopefully I can help you out.

Before I get too far into things, is your partner backing you with the healthy eating habits at home? One of the biggest things I found was training my mother to stop buying sh!t, but after a few months of my brother (who was also trying to get healthy) we finally brought her around to our side. Don't get me wrong, she was cooking healthy meals and stuff, but she was also buying all that trash and friable foods for us to "snack on" or eat when she didn't cook, eg on weekends. But now she cooks for us every night of the week, and it is always covers all the bases.

How is your home gym going? did you get around to setting something up? Eating right is certainly the biggest part of the plan, but you need a good exercise program to partner with it. If you didn't maybe it is time to think about an actual gym membership. If I remember rightly you weren't too keen on the idea, but after a couple of visits you'll realise that it isn't that bad and you'll move on and get right down to business.

Here is how I lost my weight, I've already told you about turning ym mum around, but there are 3 other things I did, that aided me in my loss:

1) This is honestly the hardest part initially, but you really have to say NO to the cravings and urges to go buy the junk food... it was so hard man, and initially I'd fall off the band wagon and by some KFC or something like that, but every time I said no I got better and better, to the point now where I hardly ever buy take aways (only when I am out for the night, that kind of thing), to get to the point mate, I am not even exaggerating took me months, but if you don't give in, you will eventually break the hold mate, you've really got to want to do it and I think you are honestly at that point in your life where I was January last year, I know you can do it mate.

I'm sure you've talked to your partner about how you are feeling, how does she feel about it? Is she willing to kick the habit with you? Because on the food front it is really a household effort, it's got to be all or nothing to get it to work.

One thing I forgot to add, you can still have a little treat one day a week, I used to have that day on my trade school day, I'd have a sausage in batter for morning tea, and take away for lunch (but I'd try not to have the ole mc donalds or kfc every week if I could help it).

2) Finding a gym partner (exercise buddy), this was a massive one for me, it helped soo much. For me it was my little brother and a couple of mates (only one trains with us now though), for the first  probably 6 months or so I trained by myself, and I'd MAYBE get to the gym 2 nights a week if I was luck (at that point I was aiming for 3). Getting the boys on board got me training 6 nights a week, and training hard for those 6 nights. Before when I was training by myself, I couldn't really go hard because I didn't have anyone to back me up, the gym instructors always offered, and occasionally I'd use them, but for the most part I felt embarrassed to ask them because I felt I was lifting so light... please DON'T make that mistake, if you are training by yourself get a spotter if you are lifting, that way you can feel comfortable to actually push your limits. Most guys at the gym will be more then happy to help you when you need it. I watch guys do it all the time for people (even complete strangers to them).

Either way, to succeed at training hard and regularly, it sounds like you need someone to train with, just like I did. Is this your partner might be interested in doing too? It might be a good thing for you 2 to do together. Otherwise do you know anyone who already trains that might be willing to let you join them? that way you have someone that knows the ropes and can teach you the ways? If neither of these options are available, then maybe just put out a general call on Facebook, if you do that, or maybe just ask around some friends. Someone will surely bite, that is how I started going for weekly walks with one of my then friends (long story, not worth going into), then later I moved on to the gym, but it was  a start.

3) Try weighing yourself very frequently, I don't know how often you do now. But I weigh myself at least twice a week for my personal records, and every night at the gym, just as a little thing amongst my bro and mate, but also it helps me to see the consequences of not eating healthy during the day, or not training hard enough the night before, or not being active enough at work. When I was actively trying to lose weight (I've met my goal weight) I was actually keeping record of my weight every day or every other day too, as well as weighing in at the gym.

I mentioned keeping records of my weight. The best thing I ever bought other then my gym membership was a set of body analyser scales. I got them really cheap online, and they were so worth it. They measure your weight, body fat, water, muscle mass and bone mass percentages, so I could actually see my gym sessions paying off, and being a numbers guy, it gave me more numbers to read. Every time I jump on the scales, I record these details on an excel spread sheet. Every time. There were times I didn't want to record a gain, but that would be cheating! And my scientific mind wanted the data to be recorded correctly, every time, no fudging the results. Recording my numbers gave me hard evidence for when I was falling off the rails and when I was doing well. It was a big help, it basically helped keep me honest, because if I let myself slip then the numbers wouldn't lie!

4)Set goals, I never used to do this. I always thought "I don't need a goal to lose weight, I'll just lose it"... wrong idea... set yourself lots of small goals, some of my very first goals were honestly just to run for 1 minute and to bench press the bar (20kgs), that is the honest truth. When you achieve that goal first goal you'll see your motivation increase and you'll strive harder for the next one, and then it'll be on for young and old!

The best way to set your goals is to sit down and say "what weight do I ultimately want to finish up on?" for me that was 100kgs, later that turned into 90kgs, now I'm contemplating pushing for me "recommended" weight of 80kgs, but have decided that I'm just going to enjoy lifting and toning up for now. Once you have your Ultimate goal, the next step is to make a serious of different little stepping stone goals, milestones if you will, don't make them all similar... I always had 1 lifting goal, 1 cardio goal and 1 weight goal, that I was trying to achieve at any one time. Make them easily achievable at first, and then make them more challenging as time goes on, but don't make them unachievable during your allotted time frame (if you have a time orientated goal).

Following these 4 points, I was able to lose 20kgs in my first 12 months, and another 20+ since January this year. I have no doubt that you'll be able to see very similar results if you follow these tips.

If you are looking for some support along the way, then jump back across to the Sly Fitness Challenge thread and list your goals for the month there. and we'll give you the encouragement and support to achieve your goals! It has been getting quite there of late, but every little bit will help :D

I'm really sorry for the massive post, but hopefully you find it helpful, especially seeing that it this is the first time I've actually sat down and document how I lost me weight.

If you want any more advice, or someone to talk to about it feel free to PM me.

Viking:
Thanks for the advice and support guys, I did read them as and when they arrived I just didn't want to reply untill I'd had a good chance to think over the whole situation.

I really need to get over the mental side of it, I think I've identified the major mental problems, the first being that I let myself down far too easy, I guess there is no real consequences to me giving up on my goals, no one else is affected, let down or dissapointed, just me and I far too easilly allow myself to get away with it. Secondly I need to just do it and get it done, without going all down and depressing I am at a point in my life where i'm left a bit dissapointed, I could have done more education wise which has left me in a job that i don't really enjoy but gives me the opportunity to support my junk food habbit therefore leaving me physically and mentally annoyed with myself. For years I've had it in my head that maybe if I shed some weight then 1) I'd feel more confident in myself, 2) I'd generally feel better physically everyday, and the two combined would help me to progress in life. This is where I think the mental block is, I have this sunny picture in my head so mentally at least I have a shot at a happier future but I think I'm actually affraid that things wont work out and I'd have nothing to hope for. I think this is what stops me, I beat myself up and fall off the wagon.

I need to embark on this lifestyle change and stick to it, I actually enjoy it when I'm on a health kick I do feel more awake, I just need to stick to it when the novelty wears off. Some great tips from above, thanks, I certainly need to plan food/meals in advance, I can have good intentions all day but come me getting home from work at 10pm at night calling up a pizza is so much easier than going to a shop, buying food then cooking. We are terrible at getting a big shop in, we really do buy almost on a meal by meal basis rather than getting everything in for a week, I think we need to learn that. I also need to learn when to make food, often I don't start thinking about food till I'm actually real hungry, I need to learn to start thinking about it when I start to feel hungry, I am one of those that'll snack my way through till the meal is on the plate then wonder why I'm not actually that hungry anymore!!

I need to make it fun also, I do enjoy cooking so I was thinking of maybe starting a healthy food blog or something, more for my own enjoyment than anyone elses and to log my journey. Same with exercise, I do actually quite enjoy it when I get round to doing any, I'll have to get back in the fitness challenge so at least if I slip you guys can give me a boot up the arse, I'm one of these who'll easilly slack off a day or reckon I can catch up later on, it doesn't work, so please I ask of you all to be honest with me, tell me off, I know deep down that you're probably right!!

Oh, and there is the small fact I have a caribbean wedding next august, that should be motivation, it's really a once in a lifetime trip and i don't want to be the guy who missed out on anything as I was too fat or unfit!!

Game on.......

OzSly:
Greats posts Gearhead, FrontierGuy and Beardman. Excellent information!!

In May this year I was diagnosed with Diabetes Type 2, It was and wasn't a shock when my Doctor told me. I weighed 150 kgs (330 lbs). I knew it was coming but had become lazy the older I got. My Doc advised me of what is going to happen if I continue the way I was going. It was the wake up call I needed.

With the help of my Doctor, dietician, diabetic educator and my lovely wife, I have lost 30 kgs (66 pounds) since May. This has been done with Diet and exercise. I am also on medication for my diabetes, high cholesterol and high blood pressure. All due to being overweight.

When I was told to go on a diet, I thought to myself, crikey!!! I am going to starve!! You know the drill, bread and water and things that taste like cardboard. How wrong was I, there is so much different foods you can eat that wont make you feel like your starving. There are so many great books on eating well. My wife has also gone on a diet (she is not overweight) to help me. As Beardman mention once a week or once a fortnight I do eat naughty food but in moderation portions but still try to eat right.

Now the exercise, in my younger days I played alot of sports, was a gym rats but as you get older, work, family and life gets in the way, the last 10 years or so I let myself go. Well, that the excuses I use to say to myself for not getting off my fat arse lol.

The excercise I started with was 30 minutes walking either on treadmill, when the weather sucks, or walking for 30 minutes or more with my wife out in the suburbs. I started doing it 7 days a week, now do it 3-4 days a week. I also play golf and lawn bowls a couple of times a week too if time permits.

My Doctor is so happy with my progress, she even mentioned that if I continue this way, she will take me off my medication! YEAH!!!

The benefits??? I feel much better, I don't get as tired as I use to. I really enjoy the food. Doing things that I could do since my younger days. I am performing better in the down stairs department, if you know what I mean. I don't want to got into more detail as this is a family channel LOL  :*))

The downside?? Not much really....the cost of medication...crikey it's expensive!!!  May pants keep falling down, my clothes need alteration and have run out of belt holes in my belt  :o LOL

Apologies for the long winded post.
 
Gearhead, hang in there mate. You have taken the most important step by facing up to your problem and for that......WELL DONE mate. It does get easier, it really does.

Sir Harry:
OzSly, thanks for sharing your story...It's telling the things that can happen if you're not careful...Good luck with getting the diabetes under control, and Gearhead, good luck with your goals as well.

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