Author Topic: Costco Doctor...  (Read 2755 times)

Slynito

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Costco Doctor...
« on: September 19, 2012, 01:46:40 PM »

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell.  I guess I'd better see a doctor."

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies.

"There's a diagnostic computer down at Costco. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.

It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars - A lot cheaper than a doctor."

So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Costco.

He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample.  He pours the sample into the slot and waits.

Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:

"You have tennis elbow.  Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity.  It will improve in two weeks.  Thank you for shopping @ Costco."

That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe began wondering if the computer could be fooled.

He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample from himself for good measure.

Joe hurries back to Costco, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

The computer prints the following:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm.  Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4.. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better!

Thank you for shopping @ Costco!



Offline -Doug-

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Re: Costco Doctor...
« Reply #1 on: September 19, 2012, 02:18:03 PM »
 :*)) :*)) :*))
Life has three aspects: Paradox, Humor, and Change.

Paradox: Life is a mystery; don't waste time figuring it out.
Humor: Keep a sense of humor, especially about yourself. It is a strength beyond all measure
Change: Know that nothing stays the same.

Offline Hingatao

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Re: Costco Doctor...
« Reply #2 on: September 19, 2012, 03:30:59 PM »
Lol! Two thumbs up!
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Offline Plano

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Re: Costco Doctor...
« Reply #3 on: September 19, 2012, 03:35:01 PM »
Haha!!! Now, if only this Computerized Costco Doctor was real.....

oooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrr is it!?  !d3@
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Offline bobster

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Re: Costco Doctor...
« Reply #4 on: September 19, 2012, 03:37:39 PM »
Pmsfl that is brilliant!

Slynito

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Re: Costco Doctor...
« Reply #5 on: September 19, 2012, 05:48:06 PM »
It is cute and also a good idea...don't forget it was my idea first!  O:O
« Last Edit: September 20, 2012, 06:39:41 AM by Slynito »

Offline Beardman

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Re: Costco Doctor...
« Reply #6 on: September 20, 2012, 06:36:32 AM »
Haha, I like it!  :*))

Offline CraftyGuy

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Re: Costco Doctor...
« Reply #7 on: September 25, 2012, 10:11:19 AM »
 :*))
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Offline Slyfive

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Re: Costco Doctor...
« Reply #8 on: September 26, 2012, 02:45:10 AM »
So good!!

 



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