Author Topic: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!  (Read 129931 times)

Offline dave523

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #45 on: July 04, 2008, 05:35:46 PM »


BTW if going straight to razored bald is too much...bro take it in stages...and no offense, but a buzzcut would be WAY more hip on you than your 80's hair...sorry, but true..

I mean your Brit brother David Beckham is buzzed bald and he comes across as a pretty hip guy!
[/quote]

Hehehe thx, that was 50 Euro's well spent on a haircut :(!


Tx guys for your replies. Actualy i've never seen a guy that doesn't get away with buzzed/sly or maybe i am just not aware (Btw i am not Britsh, i am 100% Dutch). Still not so sure about myself though. Sent in some pics to a site called headshave.baldlygo.com. You send them some pics of yourself and they give u a virtual shave. The pics and they were sent back to me an hour ago. Curious/nervous how it looks, but haven't opened pics yet .

Think it would be easier if i would have the option of hair. Seriously, wouln't you guys prefer the option to be able to grow hair to being forced to buzz (because of MPB)? Then again, in ten years from now i will probably think "what the hell was that all about  :D". As for now, not at a mental stage yet where i can accept that i might be one of the baldy's. RazorX, you are absolutely right in saying that i have got it coming, but you haven't been there. I have been a real dick making them ridiculous >:D and knowing them they will not 'ease' me into this fate >:D >:D. Maybe i should start looking for a wig  :-\

Cheers Dave



Offline Razor X

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #46 on: July 04, 2008, 08:29:36 PM »

 RazorX, you are absolutely right in saying that i have got it coming, but you haven't been there. I have been a real dick making them ridiculous >:D and knowing them they will not 'ease' me into this fate >:D >:D. Maybe i should start looking for a wig  :-\



You think they won't laugh at a wig?  ::)

Offline J Digory

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #47 on: July 04, 2008, 11:36:03 PM »
Hey man, first I wanna say welcome to the site. Secondly, I really want to let you know that life isn't fair. Some people get handed the one thing in life you want most, while you struggle and never get it your whole life. For those of us who lose our hair naturally we most always go through a phase where we moan and complain that it isn't fair. But it's not. So deal with it. I'm not trying to be harsh, man. I started thinning a while back and I seemed to be the only one that could notice. I don't know if my friends tried to be really nice and play dumb, or if they were just blind. But I SAW my hair thin, and it drove me nuts. So yeah, it can take some of us a while to come to grips with hair loss. But you really only have two choices: deal with it, or don't. I tried some different drugs, and to be honest, THAT was giving up. The longer I tried to stop my hair loss, the longer I postponed dealing with my hair loss.

I'm not trying to say bald is the answer for YOU, but you have to do something. Drugs only work as long as you use them, and that's IF they work. It's like renting a big screen tv for a really long time so you can look impressive, since you can't afford to go out and buy one. You stop renting the tv, and it's gone. Eventually your hair WILL fall out if you are thinning now. No amount of drugs can stop it eternally. And as long as you don't deal with the emotions surrounding your hair loss, it won't make any difference when it happens. At 50 years old it's still going to hurt if you're not prepared for it.

The way I see it is this: I was born white, but if I really wanted to be black I could probably undertake some expensive surgeries to look black. But for what? I am still the same exact person God made me, but now I am trying to trick people into seeing me a different way.
Do what you want with your hair, man. Cut it short, comb it over, wear a wig. Just do what ever it is you do for your self, and not so that other people see you a certain way. As long as you are trying to manipulate other people's perception of you, you're going to be uncomfortable.

On a final note, it sounds like this can actually do you some good. By your own admittance you were pretty mean to your friends about something they couldn't control. It's one thing to poke fun with your friends, and it's another to really dig into them. If you just played with your friends, then you don't really have anything to worry about. If you can't take some jokes from your buddies, then hair is the least of your concerns. But if you really were mean to them it sounds like you may have some thinking to do. You wouldn't pick on a man in a wheelchair, so why pick on someone because of something they have no control over (loss of their hair)?

Please, keep us updated, Dave. I really am curious to see what you end up doing and how you come through this. I'm cheerin' for ya.

Offline dave523

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #48 on: July 05, 2008, 04:29:47 PM »

 RazorX, you are absolutely right in saying that i have got it coming, but you haven't been there. I have been a real dick making them ridiculous >:D and knowing them they will not 'ease' me into this fate >:D >:D. Maybe i should start looking for a wig  :-\



You think they won't laugh at a wig?  ::)

Wig, off course, was a joke. No wig or HT for me, i think that just leads to obsessive behaviour about the 'situation'. Knowing myself this would mean a lifetime-self-inflicted-hair-issue-imprisonement. My options are narrowed down to:
A) take medicine and consciously enjoy having hair;
B) accept being part men that go bald;
Think the second option is the best from a philosopical point of view. The one who can let go of things in life the easiest, probably is the happiest. But i am no philosopher and a pretty vain SoaB. Hope to find the answer by hanging/looking around this forum.

J Digory:  wasn't really mean to my buddies, but was very unaware (until some months ago) that losing hair could be such an issue.

Looked at the pics of baldygo.com. At first i wasn't really shocked at the pics they returned and actuall was relieved (i probably expected worse). After having multiple looks, i am not so sure i could sport that look. Don't think i am the type to be a bald dude.

Cheers, Dave!

Offline MagmaBabe

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #49 on: July 05, 2008, 06:48:53 PM »
Hey Dave

you should go with option B.
The more negativity you put into a situation, the worse you are gonna feel about it.

In all honesty.. to ask for help regarding treatments to help your hair stop falling out..
is just plain daft  in my eyes. This is SlyBaldGuys, not the Rogaine for men club. I don't wish
to offend you in any way, obviously you're finding it hard to come to terms with your hair
loss, but the guys here can help you with that.  What we can't do is wave a magic wand and
make your hair magically grow back. It's something you are going to have to come to terms with.

If you listen to some of the testimonies from the fellas on here.. they've been through the same
thing as what you have. As of right now, you are not the only one, nor will you be the only one
to feel this way. But please..poke around a little more on the forum and do a little more reading up
regarding other members losing their hair. I think it might help.  :)

I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances ~  Martha Washington

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #50 on: July 06, 2008, 11:26:22 PM »
Hey Dave

you should go with option B.
The more negativity you put into a situation, the worse you are gonna feel about it.

In all honesty.. to ask for help regarding treatments to help your hair stop falling out..
is just plain daft  in my eyes. This is SlyBaldGuys, not the Rogaine for men club. I don't wish
to offend you in any way, obviously you're finding it hard to come to terms with your hair
loss, but the guys here can help you with that.  What we can't do is wave a magic wand and
make your hair magically grow back. It's something you are going to have to come to terms with.

If you listen to some of the testimonies from the fellas on here.. they've been through the same
thing as what you have. As of right now, you are not the only one, nor will you be the only one
to feel this way. But please..poke around a little more on the forum and do a little more reading up
regarding other members losing their hair. I think it might help.  :)



Oh, not only is she pretty, she is oh, so wise! :@`

Offline time2shine

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #51 on: July 08, 2008, 01:00:37 PM »
... I tried some different drugs, and to be honest, THAT was giving up. The longer I tried to stop my hair loss, the longer I postponed dealing with my hair loss.

Very true quote, J.
I feel like going through hairloss for me has been a test of becoming a true man.  I'm not saying that only bald men, are real men, but I am saying that it forces you to stare your struggle straight in the eye, and say, "I will not let you win"; and you either deal with it now or later.  Some say that using drugs or doing transplants is way of battling your hairloss and not giving in.  Like J Digory said, it's an inevitable fact that you will lose your hair, those "solutions" are nothing more than a psychological patch.  
Each day I am getting closer to the man I want/need to be, and I'm excited to enjoy each day, not just as a bald man, but as an original, honest, and respected person.  And as it's been covered many times in this forum: Hair does not define that.  period.

Dave, I appreciate your post and thoughts.  We are on the opposite side of the spectrums when it comes to our group of friends.  I represent the guy in your group that was first to lose his hair.  I know exactly how that guy feels, and I find myself resenting you for that reason.  On the other hand, I have been in your situation where I have joked around with people on things they cannot control; it is only until I experience it first hand, that I realize what they went through.
You will have concerns about your friends joking about your hairloss, but they have had ALL of the ups and downs that go with it.  Find solace in the fact that you have another bond that will only bring you closer as friends.
now shave it off.
« Last Edit: July 08, 2008, 03:21:53 PM by time2shine »

Offline dave523

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #52 on: July 10, 2008, 02:30:04 PM »
Hey Dave


Howdy,

What a pleasant surprise! You do not seem like a "bald" and especially "dude" at all! If i wasn't a Dutch guy on the other side of the ocean, i would feel forced to ask for your phone number  :@`.

As for your comments, you are absolutely right (well partly). The reason I am poking around this site is to find some reason. Maybe i should post my baldygo.com pics somewhere (before & after) and ask for some objective opinions.

Cheers,

Dave


Offline J Digory

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #53 on: July 10, 2008, 02:37:57 PM »
Do it. Seriously, do it. Do it. (tries for his best impression of Stiller in the not-so-good remake of Starsky and Hutch)

Offline Tyler

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #54 on: July 10, 2008, 02:41:10 PM »
Hey Dave


If i wasn't a Dutch guy on the other side of the ocean, i would feel forced to ask for your phone number  :@`.


LOL!  She's probably much closer than you think she is...
People are not limited by the circumstance that they are born in. They are limited by the size of their dreams. Show them that their dreams can have no limits and in turn their accomplishments can be limitless.

Offline dave523

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #55 on: July 10, 2008, 03:33:30 PM »
... I tried some different drugs, and to be honest, THAT was giving up. The longer I tried to stop my hair loss, the longer I postponed dealing with my hair loss.

Very true quote, J.
and you either deal with it now or later.  Some say that using drugs or doing transplants is way of battling your hairloss and not giving in.  Like J Digory said, it's an inevitable fact that you will lose your hair, those "solutions" are nothing more than a psychological patch.  
Each day I am getting closer to the man I want/need to be, and I'm excited to enjoy each day, not just as a bald man, but as an original, honest, and respected person.  And as it's been covered many times in this forum: Hair does not define that.  period.

Dave, I appreciate your post and thoughts.  We are on the opposite side of the spectrums when it comes to our group of friends.  I represent the guy in your group that was first to lose his hair.  I know exactly how that guy feels, and I find myself resenting you for that reason.  On the other hand, I have been in your situation where I have joked around with people on things they cannot control; it is only until I experience it first hand, that I realize what they went through.
You will have concerns about your friends joking about your hairloss, but they have had ALL of the ups and downs that go with it.  Find solace in the fact that you have another bond that will only bring you closer as friends.
now shave it off.

Hi time2shine,

Thanks for your reply, Strong post.

If hair doesn't define a man, what is wrong with try and keep it?

You say it is inevitable that i will lose my hair eventually. I still find that thought pretty scary and can hardly beleive it. If i am really honest it feels humiliating to be an MPB- member. I know it is only hair and i have never seen a bald guy that doesn't look good with a buzzed/shaved look. I just cannot see myself 'on the opposite side of the spectrum' as you describe it. I know for a fact that my buddies would die to meet me 'over on their side'. You probably enjoyed to see members of your group go there at the time, no?
 
Yesterday i went to my regular hair dresser. He was the first external person to notice and was very firm about it. He said: "Yep, ur thinning. No worries, that's what happens to us guys"! Damn, now i have it official (no worries, that's what happens to us...............well not him!!!!). He suggested a route: first keep the length i have now and go wild, next time he will cut it short and, depending on the progress of my mpb, buzz it one or two sessions afterwards. sh*t man! does that mean i will be bald in 4 months even if i do not follow this hairdressers route????

Cheers D.

P.s. feels like abusing this site for my 'gremlins', but sure does feel good to shed inner thought!

Offline J Digory

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #56 on: July 11, 2008, 12:57:11 AM »
You're not abusing anything, Dave. Go ahead and take your time. Write in caps if you want. I don't think you'll hurt anyone's feelings, since a good number of the blokes here have or are going through the very same thing.

Offline MagmaBabe

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #57 on: July 11, 2008, 03:16:15 AM »
Hey Dave


Howdy,

What a pleasant surprise! You do not seem like a "bald" and especially "dude" at all! If i wasn't a Dutch guy on the other side of the ocean, i would feel forced to ask for your phone number  :@`.

As for your comments, you are absolutely right (well partly). The reason I am poking around this site is to find some reason. Maybe i should post my baldygo.com pics somewhere (before & after) and ask for some objective opinions.

Cheers,

Dave



I've been called many things in my lifetime, but never a pleasant surprise, so thanks for that  ;)


You should post up your pics that you got from baldygo, it'll be interesting to see them.
I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances ~  Martha Washington

Offline time2shine

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #58 on: July 12, 2008, 12:44:32 PM »
... I tried some different drugs, and to be honest, THAT was giving up. The longer I tried to stop my hair loss, the longer I postponed dealing with my hair loss.

Very true quote, J.
and you either deal with it now or later.  Some say that using drugs or doing transplants is way of battling your hairloss and not giving in.  Like J Digory said, it's an inevitable fact that you will lose your hair, those "solutions" are nothing more than a psychological patch.  
Each day I am getting closer to the man I want/need to be, and I'm excited to enjoy each day, not just as a bald man, but as an original, honest, and respected person.  And as it's been covered many times in this forum: Hair does not define that.  period.

Dave, I appreciate your post and thoughts.  We are on the opposite side of the spectrums when it comes to our group of friends.  I represent the guy in your group that was first to lose his hair.  I know exactly how that guy feels, and I find myself resenting you for that reason.  On the other hand, I have been in your situation where I have joked around with people on things they cannot control; it is only until I experience it first hand, that I realize what they went through.
You will have concerns about your friends joking about your hairloss, but they have had ALL of the ups and downs that go with it.  Find solace in the fact that you have another bond that will only bring you closer as friends.
now shave it off.

Hi time2shine,

Thanks for your reply, Strong post.

If hair doesn't define a man, what is wrong with try and keep it?

You say it is inevitable that i will lose my hair eventually. I still find that thought pretty scary and can hardly beleive it. If i am really honest it feels humiliating to be an MPB- member. I know it is only hair and i have never seen a bald guy that doesn't look good with a buzzed/shaved look. I just cannot see myself 'on the opposite side of the spectrum' as you describe it. I know for a fact that my buddies would die to meet me 'over on their side'. You probably enjoyed to see members of your group go there at the time, no?
 
Yesterday i went to my regular hair dresser. He was the first external person to notice and was very firm about it. He said: "Yep, ur thinning. No worries, that's what happens to us guys"! Damn, now i have it official (no worries, that's what happens to us...............well not him!!!!). He suggested a route: first keep the length i have now and go wild, next time he will cut it short and, depending on the progress of my mpb, buzz it one or two sessions afterwards. sh*t man! does that mean i will be bald in 4 months even if i do not follow this hairdressers route????

Cheers D.

P.s. feels like abusing this site for my 'gremlins', but sure does feel good to shed inner thought!

I actually just typed a huge, too thought-out of a reply regarding hair defining a person, but erased it, coming to a different conclusion.  Do what makes you happy, Dave.  That's the bottom line.  Some of us shaved our heads, because it makes us happier.  If keeping your hair, or restyling it makes you happy, then do so.
I think the ultimate point is that we are all here for support.  As you said, it's a scary thing, but it can be a lot less scary when you have a resource like Sly Bald Guys.  I think the main attempt for my previous post was to emphasize that there is life after baldness.  I sure as hell didn't think so as a vain teenager.  So for me it's comforting to be in a place were many guys have gone through the same experience and have become better people because of it.


Offline MagmaBabe

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Re: "I won't look good with a shaved head." - for the guys on the fence!
« Reply #59 on: July 12, 2008, 12:47:53 PM »
great post T2T  :)
I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances ~  Martha Washington