Author Topic: Sly jokes about oneself  (Read 19240 times)

Offline Sir Harry

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #15 on: May 24, 2013, 11:23:22 PM »
 ::)"Why pay a fortune teller....I can see into my future-and yours-right here!"
Even when the d is removed, the devil is still evil.

Offline Baldandbeautiful

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #16 on: June 04, 2013, 03:44:41 AM »
I was at a pub one night with some friends and a guy across from us was playing pool, anyways I was up at the counter paying my bill. The man who was playing pool loses the ball and goes " has anyone seen a cueball?"  To which my friend replays with "yeah he's up there paying his bill" made alot of people chuckle.

Offline Mr Jules

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #17 on: June 04, 2013, 06:00:34 AM »
Standard joke in the office from me.

Female colleague brushing her hair and laments "I need to get my hair cut",
to which I reply in a dead pan tone "So do I.."



Offline greatnessinc

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #18 on: June 05, 2013, 10:08:17 AM »
I filled my head with too much knowledge and it started pushing my hair out.
"Ifyou're going through hell, just keep going"
-Winston Churchill

Offline The Bald Blur

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #19 on: August 04, 2013, 12:24:05 PM »
Some of these are older than I am but still use it from time to time: 

"God made as many perfect heads as He could and covered the rest with hair".

I'm not bald, I'm just too tall for my hair"

this one was particularly appropriate as I got older and the loss accelerated:   "I'm not losing my hair, it's just migrating south for the winter"

And finally there' the t-shirt I saw once (and mods may remove this one) that said "Bald men get more head".


Offline Sir Harry

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #20 on: August 04, 2013, 02:07:41 PM »


And finally there' the t-shirt I saw once (and mods may remove this one) that said "Bald men get more head".



Check out BaldBear's signature under his profile/posts....If that can stick around, so can the last part of your post.
Even when the d is removed, the devil is still evil.

Offline g_bald

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #21 on: August 09, 2013, 10:42:20 AM »
Since I am rather tall:

"Yeah, well plants don't grow above the tree line either..."  ;D

Offline JTH45

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #22 on: December 05, 2013, 01:38:20 AM »
And the old stand-by "Solar panel for a sex machine".

Hahahaha.  Love it!

Cheers!!
Cheers!!  C*$n

Offline imaginary

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #23 on: December 07, 2013, 12:52:32 PM »
"I wake up before the crack of dawn just so my hair can look this good."

"This humidity is wreaking havock to my hair."
Once upon a time. The End.

Offline EthanBaird

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #24 on: February 22, 2014, 12:55:22 AM »
And the old stand-by "solar panels for a sex machine".
Ya a real good one.. I think it is possible:)
« Last Edit: February 22, 2014, 08:45:53 AM by EthanBaird »

Offline M C C

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #25 on: March 18, 2014, 07:10:35 PM »
Finished a very trying phone call at work: "I'd tear my hair out but there's nothing to grab hold of."

Offline BBCESQ

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #26 on: March 21, 2014, 07:03:10 AM »
My old stand by when asked why I shave my head:

"I had a wild hair and couldn't find it"

Offline Carpet

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #27 on: March 30, 2014, 02:08:16 PM »
I always say I've air conditioning fitted

Offline GettingThere13

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Re: Sly jokes about oneself
« Reply #28 on: March 31, 2014, 11:09:28 AM »
The jokes I typically gravitate toward:

"Well, I'm not losing hair, I'm gaining scalp!"

Or, "I'm not actually losing hair, it's just moving from my head down onto my face."

And there's the classic: "Hey, most of us lose it someday. Better to look like Bruce Willis than Donald Trump."

No one seems to disagree with that last one. Haha!
THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE.

 



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