Author Topic: 20 years old and losing all hope  (Read 4290 times)

Offline RoryPond11

  • Learning the way of Sly
  • *
  • Posts: 1
  • Country: ie
20 years old and losing all hope
« on: May 17, 2017, 08:10:20 AM »
My hairline has been receding since I was 18, and male pattern baldness runs in my family.

Right now I'm losing all hope, and my confidence is being badly affected.

I shaved my head a few days ago but absolutely hated it. My head shape is horrible. I showed some of my friends and all they could do was laugh. After they apologised and said well at least it will grow back... I don't think they realise this is how I'm going to look in the not so distant future. Right now I'm just wearing a hat 24/7 and waiting for what's left of my hair to grow back :(

How can I be happy if even the most simplest solution doesn't work for me?



Online reddog

  • Sly Bureau
  • *****
  • Posts: 2008
  • Country: us
Re: 20 years old and losing all hope
« Reply #1 on: May 17, 2017, 08:31:54 AM »
As your hair grows back, hopefully you will find a style you like. A shaved head is not for everybody to like. Those of us that sport a shaved head seem to love it. Your hair will grow back quickly, so hang in there. You tried it, didn't like it, no harm done.
Bald by choice, and loving it!

Offline Zooman

  • Sly Jr.
  • **
  • Posts: 44
  • Country: us
Re: 20 years old and losing all hope
« Reply #2 on: May 17, 2017, 08:47:15 AM »
First off, welcome to the forum Rory!  Going bald is not always an easy thing to adjust too, especially when you are not really given a choice in the matter.  I'm sorry your friends haven't been more supportive, but I would guess they are just not used to seeing you this way and aren't quite sure how to react.  My free advice (for what it's worth!) is to keep your hair short and gradually get shorter and shorter buzz cuts as you get comfortable with it.  A lot of us here also have beards, so if you can grow some facial hair, that may help too.  Best of luck to you, and keep us posted on how it goes.
-Jason

Offline slybeard

  • Sly Bureau
  • *****
  • Posts: 1726
  • Country: 00
Re: 20 years old and losing all hope
« Reply #3 on: May 17, 2017, 10:07:14 AM »
I suspect your reaction and the reaction of your friends had much more to do with the significant change, and very little with your actual head shape.  It is not an uncommon reaction when a guy first shaves, especially a young guy.  Try to look at your head shape objectively and look at some of the photos you see here.  There probably is little difference in you head shape.

You could try the step down approach with a buzz cut to get you and your friends comfortable with the look gradually.  Facial hair also helps with the transition if that is an option for you.
SlyBeard

Offline Razor X

  • Sly Moderator
  • Sly Nobility
  • *****
  • Posts: 8689
  • Country: us
Re: 20 years old and losing all hope
« Reply #4 on: May 17, 2017, 10:20:46 AM »
A few days is not long enough to get used to a big change in appearance.  That isn't why we have the 30 day rule.  Ordinarily I'd say gradually go shorter,  up since you've already shaved the best thing you can do is just tough it out for a couple of weeks.  Do NOT wear a hat. Let people see and get used to that bald head. More importantly it will give YOU a chance to get used to it.  It will be tough at first but it will get easier after a few days.  Seeing people for the first time after you've shaved is always a bit anxiety-ridden but once that she out of the way things are much easier.

Post some pictures so we can give you an assessment.  I know this isn't easy but take it from someone who hasn't been through it - what I've outlined is the best way to get through it.  Things are not as bleak as they seem.   :)

Offline Tyler

  • The Count of Sly
  • Administrator
  • Sly Nobility
  • *****
  • Posts: 13405
  • Country: us
    • SILIST - Smitty's Information List
Re: 20 years old and losing all hope
« Reply #5 on: May 17, 2017, 07:03:06 PM »
I agree with RazorX. You should give yourself and others time to get used to it.  Keep your head shaved for 30 days straight and I'm sure your perception of it will change for the better.
People are not limited by the circumstance that they are born in. They are limited by the size of their dreams. Show them that their dreams can have no limits and in turn their accomplishments can be limitless.

Offline CowtownBaldie

  • Sly Jr.
  • **
  • Posts: 49
  • Country: 00
Re: 20 years old and losing all hope
« Reply #6 on: May 19, 2017, 07:22:08 AM »
Rory, I had a receding hair line very young as well. I know how it feels. I also joined the military very young and had my first buzz cut.  I found this was the perfect hair cut for a receding hair line. It drew attention away from it, was easy to take care of and I kept that style until I hit my 30's and went completely sly. If I were you I would try the buzz cut. Most barbers don't charge much for it...or you can get your own clippers and use different length guides, experimenting with what length is right for you.

Offline Montana

  • Sly Jr.
  • **
  • Posts: 31
  • Country: us
  • Get busy living
    • Life Inside Jack
Re: 20 years old and losing all hope
« Reply #7 on: May 19, 2017, 08:47:58 AM »
I'll add this: My dad was a violent alcoholic. My head bears the scars of some serious trauma.

But no one else knows anything about that. Only me. So I shave my head, grab a t-shirt and walk out the door smiling because if I show fear or unhappiness then that's how others will see me. I have no need for that.

Shave your head. Pull your shoulders back, and wear it in strength. When you show confidence in yourself, others will have confidence in you.
---
Love. Joy. Hope. Peace. Freedom.